Journey to Nepal

Always An Adventure

2010-10-16T21:51:00.000-07:00

Let me assure you, it is ALWAYS an adventure to travel with me. We left San Francisco on Sunday morning and arrived in Korea on Monday afternoon. We had been assured when we were issued our tickets that I did not need a visa for China since I wasn’t leaving the airport. We were also assured at the check-in counter that I was good to go. As we tried to board our plane for Chengdu on Monday evening, there was quite a fair amount of confusion as to whether I would be allowed on the plane (Tom has a multiple entry visa to China). They eventually relented and allowed me on board.
When we arrived in Chengdu just after 11pm, we saw a deserted airport and no signage that would allow us to get to a Transfer Desk and on to the airport lounge. Instead, we found ourselves standing in line at the sterile area filling out arrival cards for China.
As I handed over my passport, they asked for my transit visa.
“Um, no, I am not leaving the airport.”
“You are going to Lhasa?”
“No, I am going to Kathmandu.”
“You are going to Lhasa? Tibet?”
“No, I am going to Kathmandu.”
“Please stand over there.”
There are only a few things more gut wrenching that seeing your passport taken away in a country where you do not have a valid visa and a country that is still rather militant.
Tom was also asked to stand with me, and then we were moved to chairs. Nine customs officers surrounded our passports and there was much talking and waving and examination of stamps.
We feared they thought I was a Tibetan dissident.
Eventually, they handed over our passports and told us to pick up our luggage. And thus as new adventure.
We explained our luggage had been checked through to Kathmandu since we were going to sit in the airport lounge and not leave the airport. They explained that at Chengdu, the airport closes and there is no facility for transit luggage or transit passengers. Bonus!
We were escorted to the departure hall with all of our luggage (6 large pieces plus carry-on) and told that we would probably have to wait outside on the sidewalk when the airport finally closes. Airport security came by an hour later and escorted us down to the arrival hall where we set up camp under a set of escalators for 6 hours.
I checked our passports and it had stamps in them issuing us a one day visa to China. Our next concern was all of our luggage, since we were flying the rest of the way on Air China who have very different luggage allowances to United. When the counter finally opened at 6:10am on Tuesday, we were the first in line. After much negotiation, our luggage was allowed on at no charge.
When I first booked our ticket, I was told our flight from Chengdu to Kathmandu had a 1 hour stop in Dhaka to pick up passengers. As the flight took off and we saw the flight map, we realized we were on board a plane to Lhasa. When we arrived in Lhasa, we all had to deplane and go through immigration. So it turned out that it was an absolute blessing to be stopped at Chengdu and issued a 1 day visa because dealing with Lhasa customs and immigration would’ve been impossible.
We were thrilled to finally land in Kathmandu. We were met at the airport by a driver from the hotel and after check-in we drove to Dhapasi to pick up the girls.
More this afternoon …
Love,
Fi & Tom

Expectations

2009-11-04T06:31:00.000-08:00

Little Sita putting lotion on her face in the morning .... priceless!

Dear All,

Expectations are a funny thing. I started wearing Nepali clothes on my first visit, and I have been slowly adding to my Nepali wardrobe each trip. For the most part, I am in a sari, and occasionally I'll wear a kulta sulwar. I hadn't realised how my clothes was viewed by the kids until a couple of days ago.

On Monday I woke up under the weather. After breakfast, Tom and the girls headed off to school while I stayed home and rested. In the afternoon, I donned a pair of yoga pants and t-shirt and headed off to pick the girls up from school (so very suburban of me!). All the kids checked on me to make sure I was OK and we headed home. The next morning, I decided I was just going to wear what I had worn the previous afternoon just because I didn't want to do more laundry, Tom laughed that I had finally gotten over the novelty of draping a sari in the morning. Ten minutes before Tikaram arrived to pick us up, Kabita says, "Mum, you are staying home today too?" "No, why?" "Nothing." Two minutes later, Apsara comes out of her room, surveys my clothes and says "Mum, today you are not getting dressed?" Called out! Tom grins and points out, "It's your own fault for creating expectations." Thank goodness it only takes me 5 minutes to slap on a sari!

Group birthday celebrations

With so many children at the home, birthdays are now celebrated as a group. This past Saturday was Halloween as well as a birthday celebration. All the children who had birthdays in October were the star event. Pre-birthday celebration was sporting games, and Halloween games. Much fun was had by all.

Kabita in disguise

While Tom chased the kids around in his Halloween outfit, I was on tikka duty. I had tikka'd the girls' house on Apsara's birthday, but the 2nd girls' house and boys' house had requested a tikka too. While I am sure there is a religious rite to the tikka, when I perform tikka, it is not religious. It is purely affection for all parties involved. The children getting a blessing from a parent and I am more than pleased to be able to hand out blessings in a way they culturally understand.

Tom in his Halloween outfit

Yesterday we took Kabita to the Lions' Eye Institute at the Teaching Hospital in Maharagunj. It was a little too far to travel in Kathmandu traffic to Til Ganga Eye Hospital. It turns out she suffers from a moderate case of convergence insufficiency, or as they call it in Nepal, "fusional insufficiency". So we will be traveling regularly to the clinic for her to do exercises on the optical machine, plus I am working with her twice a day, at home, on her eye muscles.

Warning label, Nepali style, on a box of cereal

Tom and I are bravely fighting off a cold. I think it is a combination of virus plus Nepali pollution. While we are living slightly elevated from the rest of the valley, the daily travels out and about seem to have caught up with our breathing passages.

Sending love to all!

A Crash Course In Parenting

2009-11-01T04:59:00.000-08:00

Updated family photo

Hi Everyone!

It's been a very different experience for our little clan. A combination of new experiences, new routines and new expectations, plus throw it cultural differences, and you have a bucketload of new moments.

Our kitchen door that leads into the backyard doesn't quite close firmly, so to minimize drafts, the hotel has a cloth windstop at the base of the door. Kabita says to me, "Mum, I think we have rats." "Rats? Did you see a rat?" "No, they have this here, this is to keep out rats." "Oh, I don't think it is too keep out rats ..." Kabita then looks very troubled ... "Then we have snakes???" It would never have occurred to me that it was to keep out rats & snakes!

Tonight, the girls had to put a few things in the fridge for me when Apsara noticed the freezer. It's a little dorm room fridge, so the freezer had iced. She picked at the ice and very excitedly called for her sister. There was some chattering in Nepali and then the questions came; "What is this?" "What happens if we put in water?" "What is this in it?" (frozen chicken) I found a of couple ice trays and we currently have a tray of water in the freezer awaiting its turn into ice, hopefully before bedtime. I hadn't even thought of explaining what ice cubes where to the girls!

There have been days where I feel all I am doing it cooking, cleaning, doing laundry and doing school runs and the days just run into each other.

I've become quite proficient with hand gestures and a few Nepali words. "Eh!" through the nose and with a flick of my hands and a wrinkled nose shows displeasure at the quoted price. "Che!" with a wrinkled nose shows general displeasure.

I have also become equally proficient at sneaking legumes into meals (legumes? what legumes?), dealing with picky eaters (food pyramid) and doing several things at the same time.

Much love,

Fi

Some pictures & a quick update

2009-10-29T03:54:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone!

Life has been very busy here in Nepal. In addition to the hectic schedule, everything takes 10 times as long to accomplish. There is no ability to make appointments, and if there is, chances are, things are running a few days late.

So here's a quick update on what we have been doing since Saturday:

- Sunday saw internet restored in our apartment. That has saved us taking turns walking to the lobby at regular intervals to check messages. We went swimming in our pool. It was CHILLY! despite it being a rather warm day and just toasty in the sunshine.

Tom & the smallest kids. Reeka & Fi & Kabita Karki

- Monday started early. Apsara needed to go to the dentist. It turns out that one of her baby molars needed to be extracted and boy, did she scream and howl! Everyone at the dental hospital was rather concerned and came running, but no one could console her. I think most of it was just the anticipation of the extraction, then follow by the fact Mum and Dad were there. By the end of school, she was her usual chirpy self and was more than happy to laugh up a storm.

I got the opportunity to meet with Sarayu's family in Chabil and enjoyed everyone's company greatly, not to mention the wonderful food that Amrita prepared.

Fi's daily hair decorations by the girls. Anu Maya & our Apsara sharing a laugh

- Tuesday: We hadn't figured out how to get laundry done in our apartment, so we drove into Thamel and enjoyed a morning and dropped off 10kgs of laundry to be done.

- Wednesday: Our driver, Tikaram, met us with our clean laundry and his brother to drive for us. His 6 year-old daughter developed jaundice and he needed to take care of her. I had lunch with Kalpana in New Road and she came up to meet the girls after school.

Our apartment building. Girls making a wish that Tom won't go bald!

- Today: APSARA'S birthday! What more do I need to say? She woke up to a new t-shirt and when she came into the kitchen for tea and biscuits, Roo was sitting on her chair waiting for her. She handed our lollies at lunch time like a super star and after school, came home, did homework and unwrapped her Lil Miss Sunshine watch. We went out for a dinner of chicken chowmein and lassi and finished up with my family tradition of Black Forest cake for dessert. We think she had a little too much fun today and had to be sent to bed early with a cold. She has a party on Saturday, so more pictures then too.

Apsara doing Romila's hair

Some highlights:

- The feminist movement is in its fledgling state in Nepal. For the past week or so, they have had a feminist conference here at our hotel. We pass a banner every day that reads "We respect men who respect women. Real men do not dominate". It is very cute and Kabita & Apsara have really taken it to heart.

- On that note, our housekeeping staff walked in on Tom ironing the girls' uniforms and stood around for a while chortling. Kabita also walked in on it and her jaw just dropped. Apsara took everything in stride and said, "Dad, that is not correct how you are ironing. Kabita knows how to do, she will do".

- Tom downloaded "Speak and Spell" for the girls and they LOVE it.

- Apsara has been re-writing her life history. A couple of days ago, she said to me, "Mum, because my name is Apsara, that means nobody gave birth to me. I just came down from the sky and God told me to come and live with you."

Hope you enjoy the photos and I will send more soon!

Love

Setting up home in Budhanilkantha

2009-10-24T07:18:00.000-07:00

Dear All,

There is something very amazing and overwhelming about arriving in Kathmandu. No matter how many times you visit, the differences between Australia/USA and Nepal are just incredible. There are so many things we expect as part and parcel of our modern lives but when you are in a country like Nepal, you realize that these things are not expectations, they are absolute luxuries: running water at any time of day, electricity at any time of day and garbage pick up at regular intervals. I watch women pump water from a communal well, children use old car parts as toys, and we have gone from ATM to ATM needing to withdraw local currency only to be told that there is a currency shortage so there is a strict limit at the ATMs.

It has been so wonderful seeing all the children, they are all growing like weeds. They are all still slowly arriving from their villages after the holidays and it might be another week until Michael has full houses again. There is also a house full of volunteers, so things are, as always, quite hectic but exciting here.

This trip, Tom & I are doing things slightly differently. We have rented an apartment at the edge of the city, and Kabita and Apsara have moved in with us for the month. We have 24/7 hot water and electricity. What a treat! Apsara has declared that she is going to have a shower every single day! I also have a little kitchen to cook meals and a couple of appliances at my disposal, namely a fridge, a microwave (its timer dial is not an exact science!) and a mini toaster oven.

Tom and I haven’t quite slowed down to Nepali time yet. We groan in disbelief and frustration when we cannot get our mobile phones to work like they should (“network error” or “network busy”), and we shake our heads at poor customer service. Yet, there are so many wonderful people here too. Because of the location of our apartment in relation to the city and to the girls’ school, we have a personal driver this trip. After having met quite a few taxi drivers who have been vying for the “worst driver in the world” award, we now have one of Nepal’s best drivers. Tikaram is delightfully punctual, careful and incredibly patient, oh and he knows his way around in a country that has no street signs or house numbers! What a bonus! If anyone is coming to Nepal, let me know and I will give you his number.

Today we walked to the Sleeping Vishnu temple in Budhanilkantha and the tide of humanity was overwhelming. The girls and I did puja at a temple and I am sure I stepped in some pretty funky fluidy thing. After returning back to our apartment, I ushered the girls into the bathrooms and we all washed our feet thoroughly!

Another cultural difference we struggle with, given our language barriers, is the pairing of terms eg “salt & pepper”. It just does not exist, or if it does, their pairings are equally obscure to us.
We are still jetlagged and attempting to work out a daily routine. I have a feeling parents are not allowed to ever suffer jetlag and have to hit the ground running at any given time; we have hit the ground but are not quite up to running speed yet.

Nonetheless, we still feel very blessed, and send you all lots of love,

Fi

P.S. I pretty much packed everything, plus the kitchen sink, but managed to forget the USB cable for the camera. Never fear, Tom has an ingenious way of uploading photos, but it'll take me a couple of days to figure out and then I'll post.

Living the fancy life in Pokhara

2009-04-05T20:40:00.001-07:00

We have spent the past few days camping out at the Shangri-La Village Resort in Pokhara. It’s been a real treat for everyone. Today we are staying an extra day because of a national bundha (strike). There are many worst places to be. The only downside to it is that we will miss out on a day with the other children at Papa’s House and maybe sessions with various attorneys.

The kids have finally unwound from their exams and it is great for us to be able to breathe again. Pollution is a lot less here.

The girls have been busy experiencing many firsts. First time on a row boat, first time fishing, first Korean meal (which I think has been our best meal out in Nepal), first jigsaw puzzle, first hammock, first real bed, first hot showers, first time with electricity 24/7, first facial, first salad, first time feeding fishes, and the list goes on.

While I have lots of great pics, the Internet is not holding up well so I will only post pics after we get home to California.

Tom and I have also been experiencing a large range of new experiences as parents to two daughters; dealing with tantrums, a sick child and lack of sleep, resistance to new foods/activities and enforcing discipline while having a good time.

Lots of love from Pokhara,

Fi

More Thoughts on Life

2009-04-03T08:00:00.000-07:00

I am torn about rain in Kathmandu. On one hand, it cleans the air and settles the dust so that you can breathe, but on the other hand, it makes slippery mud piles all over the valley. There are moments where you wonder if it is just mud or something else …

With the rain, we lost precious electricity even earlier than usual because of the giant thunder and lighting storm. It felt that the claps were right above our bed for a good 10 minutes. We were lucky and our house stayed very dry inside. The girls’ house had one of their play areas totally flooded, and since there is so much open space, a lot of water made it to various areas.

It also took out the Internet at our house, so we were without a line to the world for 3 whole days!

The lane outside our house is finally getting paved. Nepali women fill me with awe. On a diet of dhal bhat, they do ALL the heavy labour on any construction site. While I cautiously navigate the pebbles and broken bricks, they glide effortlessly over the same area with over 20 kgs of building material stacked on their backs and balanced by a towel wrapped around their heads.

The men, like every other construction site in the world, stand around, direct traffic and sing and whistle.

It seems each new day in Dhapasi brings a new house. Our little village is no longer a village but a sprawling suburb.

I keep forgetting to tell everyone – Apsara has mastered the art of riding an escalator! I am so proud! We have a new supercenter near us and it is all very exciting. Kabita is not impressed by the concept and hops on the first step and then races up to the rest of the steps to get off ASAP. They also have an elevator, but with the power outages, I am not so keen on giving it a go, even if Bhat Bhatini has its own generator.

One of my most cherished moments is walking Apsara to school in the morning. Even if I look like something the cat dragged in, we have the same conversation on the same stretch of the walk:

A: “Mum?”

F: “Yes?”
A: “You are looking sooooooo beautiful today”
F: “I love you”
A: “I love you too”

We had a Holi on Thursday and Saturday this week, so it has been wonderful to spend time with the girls. We’ve played Monopoly and Connect 4, and they are attempting to master Checkers.

Our friends here in Kathmandu have been very generous, and have extended their wonderful hospitality each Holi. It has been a totally new experience for the girls to visit with friends, and to share a meal with adults where they are a part of the conversation and the ongoing activities.

Tom and I picked up some workbooks for the girls via Amazon, and they are powering through them; I think if we get the chance to bring them home, they will be very well prepared for school. I still can’t wrap my head around my 8 year old doing algebra at school!

Things on the legal side is plodding along Nepali style, so we just treasure each moment we get with the girls and acknowledge that we are not your average family, but it is just how we are.

Sending love, as always,

A Day In Dhapasi

2009-03-24T07:49:00.000-07:00

Dear All,

I can’t believe we are nearing the middle of our trip, and Tom and I are just getting into the swing of life here.

We wake up, and every few days I try to get some laundry washed and hung before we head up to the 1st girls’ house. There, I very slowly do hair (again I am not sure how Michael and his staff braid 45 heads every morning in record time), no more than 4 or 5 girls on any given day and then we walk the first set of girls down to school.

Since exams started, Kabita attends school at 1 pm and Apsara heads off at 9 am.

After dropping the kids off at Skylark, we pop in to say “good morning” to the new girls from Narti and the “new” boys who are all being homeschooled. Snowball gets a quick cuddle too.

As morning classes start, Tom and I head off to buy some veggies and head back to the volunteer house for a spot of tea and breakfast. By the time we gather our thoughts, it is time for the first round of tiffin.

We meander down to the 2nd house to say “hi” to the kids heading off the school for the 1 pm session, say “hi” to the big kids who finish at 12:30 and then wait for the 1 pm tiffin session kids. I know, it gets very confusing!

This week, things have been slightly different since Apsara finishes school at 1pm, so we have been spoiling her with treats. Yesterday, we took her to KFC (Kathmandu Fried Chicken), and today I cooked goat and pulau for her, and she helped me paint the many Nalgene water bottles Tom had picked up for the children.

At 3-ish, we walk her back to the house so that she can get ready for her tuition session with “Ma’am” who comes to the house everyday at 4pm to do exam prep with the girls. Kabita gets home just after 3:30pm.

By 5:30 pm, we are wiped out and today, I came down with a cold, so we head back to the volunteer house, to wait for electricity and stare at each other wearily but happily.

One week until we take the girls on our first family vacation to Pokhara; I can't wait!

Lots of love,

Luckiest Tourist in All of Nepal

2009-03-22T06:12:00.000-07:00

I was the luckiest tourist in all of Thamel yesterday afternoon. We had finished a morning of shopping, negotiated for a taxi and gotten in, when we were asked to get back out by a policeman because the taxi had picked us up in a “no picking tourists up” section of the street (this is new). We got out and the taxi drove off, then I realized my wallet had fallen out of my backpack into the back seat of the taxi. So I started screaming and running after my taxi and half of Thamel’s rickshaw drivers also ran after my taxi. It took a couple of tries before my taxi (whose driver was completely oblivious to the commotion) was found and my wallet returned. Of course, by this stage, the taxi had driven past the “no picking up tourist” zone and we hopped right back in and came home. When we reached Dhapasi, he made doubly sure that I had not left my wallet behind again!

The kids are all still studying very hard for exams. We are praying very hard that teachers do not go on strike or have a general strike called between now and the 30th of March or else it will ruin holiday plans.

Michael and his staff are amazing; with exams, each class has different schedules, so they are getting ready for school at different times, and coming home at different times, and having lunch at different times. I can imagine the stress of that for most parents with a couple of children but to have 102 kids to cater for, it is just amazing.

I got ready for the upcoming holidays by picking up some classic story books at the Education Book House to read to the girls before bedtime.

You are getting a rash of blog entries because we have been getting electricity between 4pm and 8pm ... we are getting spoilt!

Love

Fi

My 8 year-old wears Prada ...

2009-03-21T06:34:00.000-07:00

Today was a wonderful day. It was Holi, so we were very excited to be able to take Kabita, Apsara & Chham to meet our friends, the Gurung family, who were having a family reunion in Chakrapath.

The kids got dressed up and we headed down the hill in search of a taxi. We probably could've walked but I decided I didn't want to show up red faced and bothered.

At the Gurung's we were fed a hearty breakfast as well as juice, tea and biscuits and prawn crackers. It was a great experience for the kids to interact with friends and family. Uncle Gurung Snr explained to Chham the benefits of working hard and joining the British Gurkha Army, and extended an open invite to his home any time Chham had the opportunity. We promised we would take Chham back for another visit before we left for home.

After our visit, we headed to the new Bhat Bhetini shopping center and the kids experienced escalators. While Tom and I thought it was lots of fun to watch, it was serious business for the kids, especially Kabita, who is such a serious soul on any given day.

We left the shopping center with 2 pairs of shoes for Apsara and a pair of shoes for Chham. Apsara got a pair of sneakers as well as party shoes, which was a $6 pair of Prada knockoff ballet flats. I was mildly jealous.

This was followed by ice cream and then lunch at the corner chicken sekawa. I am always impressed by the amount of food little kids can pack away. Since I was all excited by tetra paks of Harvey Fresh milk, I made hot chocolate for them when we got back to Dhapasi.

All in all, it was a very full day with lots of happy memories. Tomorrow it is back to school and exams.

Sending lots of love,

Back in Nepal - AGAIN!

2009-03-20T06:20:00.000-07:00

Dear All,

Yes, we’ve done it again; we are back in Dhapasi. Many things have changed and nothing has changed, all at the same time. The dust in the air is still as thick as ever and dhal bhat first thing in the morning is still tough on the gut. 20 hours a day without electricity is also pretty hard.

Our Kabita is as tall as I am (not much of a feat, some of you will think), but at least both girls still think it is pretty cool to hang out with Mum and Dad. This morning, Kabita greeted us at the gate with Christmas gifts she had made. Tom has a new scarf and I have a new handbag and head band, all knitted with love and a good dose of skill. We are blessed.

On the way here, we stopped in Singapore and stayed the night in a hotel that had an “Aspara” spa. We took the spa menu with us and this morning, Tom tried to tell Apsara that she had been spelling her name wrong the whole time, and this was how she had to spell her name from now on; if it is in print, it must be true. The poor girl looked torn and not 100% sure if he was jesting. We are tough parents.

This trip, we are staying at the new volunteer hostel between the two homes. Two weeks ago, 26 new girls joined the growing family here at Papa’s House from the Dang Region of Nepal and they now occupy the old volunteer house. That property now also has a loyal mascot, Snowball, the dog. Snowball is usually white and tan but due to the recent Holi, was tikka’d by all the kids, so s/he is currently pink, white and tan. I haven’t looked to see what sex the dog is, but depending on the child, it is either a boy dog or a girl dog.

While there are many luxuries I miss when I am here (like constant electricity), there is nothing like getting a bag of fresh vegetables for $1. My veggie lady tried to sell me mushrooms, I am sure they were perfectly safe but I really wasn’t in the mood to try strange fungus on my first week here!

Tom has been serenading the kids with hip hop and old show tunes. American Idol, eat your heart out! While he was entertaining, I was undergoing my obligatory zoombra (nits) check, you’ll be pleased to know, I am currently zoombra free, let’s hope it stays that way. All the girls are mortified at how short my hair is but they understood why my hair was as short as it is.

Exams start tomorrow, so all the kids who attend Skylark Academy are studying hard. This afternoon I plan to have a mock spelling test for Class 1. Despite all the pressures of exams, we will have the opportunity to celebrate many birthdays.

I know this blog is missing photos, but I will post some pics in the next day or so (or when we next get electricity at a decent hour).

Lots of love,

Fi

All We Want For Christmas ....

2008-11-07T21:32:00.000-08:00

Dear Friends & Family,

This year, Tom, Kabita, Apsara & I have some Christmas wishes we hope you can help us fulfill:

1. Please continue to keep us in your prayers, and pray that our family will be together, living under the same roof soon.

2. If you are thinking of sending us a gift, please spend the money for a child or a family that needs it. You don't have to send money or gifts specifically to Nepal, but we ask that you help a local Gift Tree or food bank. In today's economy, many children and families are going to be very hard hit this Christmas and they all need our help.

We believe one of the reasons Nepal continues to suffer with such widespread and debilitating poverty is that neighbours have forgotten what it means to help each other. With the civil war, people have forgotten about community, about the ability to trust each other and forgotten how to put their hand out in friendship and support. So this Christmas, we ask you to say a little prayer of thanks for the blessed lives we all have and to reach out to your community and remind them that people care and we all share this one world.

God Bless,

Tom, Kabita, Apsara & Fiona

A long trip home

2008-11-07T21:04:00.001-08:00

Dear Family & Friends,

I am finally back in home in California. The trip home was particularly long but allowed me to catch up with some new friends and a very old friend I haven't seen since high school.

As most of you know, I flew to Delhi on this trip with frequent flyer points and then bought a ticket to KTM. So, on the way back, I flew back into Delhi and had to stay overnight. I picked Ajanta Hotel out of a website, and it turned out to be a hotel staffed by Nepalis! They were all very concerned about my safety and comfort because it is not everyday a Nepali woman travels by herself. Little did they know ...

From Delhi I flew to Singapore, where I was met by Lynn Ee, a friend from my PLC days in Perth. Lynn is doing some wonderful work with high school "dropouts" and working hard everyday to preserve what little is left of Singapore's farming area (yes, I didn't know that existed either!). We had dinner with Nepali friends and talked about our various adventures. Lynn, of course, is beyond hospitable and I thank her from the bottom of my heart.

I knew I had been in South Asia for a long time, because as I turned the shower on, the water on the floor turned a luscious muddy brown colour!

The next day I attempted to catch a flight back to San Francisco, only to be told at the gate that my plane was broken and they had to wait for a comparable plane to arrive from Hong Kong before we could leave Singapore. Under normal circumstances, I would grit my teeth and return to the lounge, but in this case, it would mean that I would miss my connecting flight to SF from Tokyo. After pleading with Singapore Airlines staff to be put on another flight to SF, Tom received a call from me asking him to call United to see if they can get me on SQ2 to SF because SIA refused to do it because I was flying on a United free ticket.

An hour or so later of Tom talking to various people at United, I was allowed on SQ2, and I made it home 7 hours later than planned, after being escorted to my seat by airport police in Hong Kong because I was carrying an EpiPen.

Anyway, I now home, allowing my medical team to put me back together, and missing the girls so insanely much. Our home suddenly seems too quiet, the appliances too loud, and even Bijou seems subdue. Each time we have to leave the girls, it just gets harder.

I came home with a cough/flu that I picked up from Apsara and have since passed on to Tom. Poor Tom!

Tomorrow we are hoping we will make it to Interplast's Gala Dinner (spluttering coughs and aching bones withstanding) in San Francisco where Dr Shankar Rai from the Kathmandu Model Hospital is being awarded a humanitarian award for the work he does for Nepali people. http://www.interplast.org/ Shankar is one of the new friends I made on this trip and it was the least Tom and I could do to support him at his award dinner.

Once again, my sincerest thanks to Michael and all the staff at Papa's House for their generous and wonderful hospitality. If you ever have a moment where you wonder where you want to travel or what you want to do that is different from your everyday life, Tom and I definitely recommend you check out http://www.volunteernepal.com/ and consider spending some time with these wonderful, and amazing children.

I made so many new friends on this trip, and I thank all of you for sharing my journey with me. I cannot wait to see you all again.

Namaste,

Fiona

Happy Birthday, Happy, Happy Birthday! Apsara!

2008-10-30T04:33:00.001-07:00

Trying to calm down with Nancy Drew, while waiting for her party.

Apsara has been hanging out for her birthday ever since I arrived. Last night was her party at the house and today, she had a restaurant lunch with Kabita and two friends.

She couldn't stop bouncing before the party, and kept singing "Happy, happy, happy, happy birthday" to herself. She finally calmed herself down by flicking through the pages of the Nancy Drew book I had just given her and Kabita.

Admiring her birthday cake.

This birthday was particularly special for me. I was given the duty to walk the birthday girl into the room, where all her sisters were waiting, and I got the first bite of the first piece of cake, plus I got to hand Apsara her gifts.

This is something Kabita and Apsara have been doing for each other since they arrived at Papa's House, but Kabita pointed out yesterday that it is the mother's duty, and since I was here, and their mother, it was now my task to perform. It truly meant the world to me.

At La Dolce Vita. From left: Apsara. Cila, Kabita, Sita.

Today was Bhai Tikka. A special day where younger brothers are honoured here in Nepal. After the ceremony at the boys' house, Apsara, Kabita, Cila, Sita and I travelled to Thamel for pizza.

The hope was to have lunch at Fire and Ice but that was closed, as was the Roadhouse. We wandered over to La Dolce Vita and was treated to a wonderful lunch of pizzas, soup, garlic bread and spaghetti.

The waiters were attentive and very kind to all of us, chatting with the girls and I. I think this is definitely going to be a new favourite haunt!

Getting a taxi home was slightly tricky, since they were explaining to me that it was a festival, so they had a right to charge 3 times the normal rate. We managed to find a taxi for a reasonable price and headed home happily.

Kabita & Apsara

Sending a ton of love, as always,

A Day At Fatima's Healing Centre

2008-10-28T05:01:00.000-07:00

Kabita looking very thoughtful at what she was experiencing.

Today started off slow. I am feeling overwhelmed by the pollution and have a wicked cough and funky sinus.

Luckily I remembered, our new friend Susan Stenson had pointed out a healing centre a few days ago, and I decided to take the girls for the foot bath. It is called Fatima's Healing Centre. While we didn't have the opportunity to meet Fatima this trip, we had a wonderful relaxing time. Fatima is Chinese-Muslim and all her treatments are based on Chinese medicine.

Apsara, the more adventurous of the two, looking very happy.

On arrival, we were ushered into a room that just oozed relaxation. Our wooden buckets were filled with hot water and a little packet of Chinese medicine opened and poured in. The medicine bubbled and became a vat of jelly. Kabita was cautious, Apsara was thrilled.

This was followed by foot reflexology, leg, arm, face, head, back massage. How much better could it get??? We have been wanting to expose the girls to different experiences, and I think this definitely counts! Apsara kept asking her therapist "What are you doing to me??" but she had a wonderful time.

We all floated out of there, very pleased at the expenditure of 1500 rps (US$20) and stopped for some ice cream at the shopping centre next door (where we made some new friends) before heading back home to Dhapasi.

One more sleep to Apsara's birthday!

Lots of love,

Fi

P.S. And if you are wondering why there are suddenly so many entries, it is because it is Tihar and we have electricity!!! I guess you can't really have the Festival of Lights without lights!!

Puja at Pashuphatinath

2008-10-27T06:15:00.000-07:00

Having fun at Pashuphatinath

Clockwise: Kabita, Kabita, Apsara, Puja, Yasoda

A very happy Tihar to you all. Life is very noisy here in Nepal, with firecrackers and fireworks and prayers.

It is the celebration of lights and Laxmi, the god of wealth, watches over all the celebrations.

Our Kabita had been wanting to go to puja (worship) this week, so I decided to go big and take the girls to Pashuphatinath.

It was wonderful to have Kabita Karki as a guide, since she her family lives in Pashuphatinath.

Getting a blessing from the Monkey god, at the "Entrance For The Hindus Only" sign

Only Hindus are allowed into temples, but ever since arriving in Nepal, I've been constantly mistaken for Nepali (from the Rai ethnic group), so I decided to test it and walk into the holiest of temples with 5 kids in tow. The girls were midly apprehensive, and the whole area was teaming with police for crowd control purposes and to make sure tourists don't sneak by. But policeman after policeman just kept waving us through. We paid a lady to look after our shoes, and climbed the steps into the Temple of Lord Vishnu.

No photos are allowed in the temple, so these photos were taken outside.

We rang bells, and threw rice and tikka powder and flowers and rupees at shrines and lesser temples. We waved incense sticks and made wishes. As I was warning the girls on the danger of randomly throwing rupees, I was hit in the face by a random rupee, which I think, reinforced the point I was trying to make!

Making a wish. I hope we were all wishing for the same thing.

I think the funniest moment for me at Pashupathinath today, was when I noticed tourists taking pictures of the girls and I as we went about making puja; the crazy Nepali woman and her 5 kids. It took all my strength not to break out in a grin.

Another wonderful day here in Nepal.

Sending love,

Happy, happy birthday Maila (Sudeep), Ashok & Roshan

2008-10-27T06:03:00.000-07:00

From left: Hikmat, Ashok, Chham, Maila (Sudeep) & Roshan.

Birthdays are always special here at Papa's House, even though there is at least one birthday every week.

Yesterday I was lucky enough to take Maila, Roshan and Ashok for their birthday pizza at the Roadhouse, with Hikmat and Chham coming along for crowd control purposes.

We demolished 6 pizzas, 5 milkshakes and 1 fresh lemon soda. It is always such a fun experience watching the boys demolish their pizzas!

This birthday was particularly special since this is Roshan's & Ashok's first birthday.

After the lunch feast, Raja Wani, a wonderful friend here in Nepal, took all of us to his uncle's leather factory to see how the beautiful handmade bags are made. The boys got the feel various types of hide and ask questions about the process.

Ashok who has a wonderful enquiring mind was particularly fascinated by everything.

Being Tihar, it was a little difficult finding a vacant taxi to pile into to get back home to Dhapasi.

Much fun was had by all.

Sending lots of love as always,

I Can't Believe I'm Missing This!

2008-10-22T14:35:00.000-07:00

Good early morning, dear friends near and far,

I'm not sure I'm actually allowed to blog since I'm currently in Shanghai instead of amongst the love and laughter known as "Papa's House". But it is only my body sitting staring out of my high rise window at a darkened Shanghai skyline. (It is actually quite amazing...The Shanghainese complained about the light pollution, and now each night after a certain time, the city goes black.) My heart and spirit however are with my wife, my two beautiful daughters, and all the other gorgeous young souls who exude the love, kindness, and courtesy we all should strive to achieve.

First and foremost, I would like to take this opportunity to extend a personal debt of gratitude to Dr. Keith. Keith recently helped me to fulfill a promise to Sabitra Didi...Yes, Keith donated new prosthetic feet. Not only was the quality first rate, he over-nighted them over a weekend to make sure Fiona got them before she left for Nepal. I honestly can't thank Keith enough for his tired-less efforts to get these done in time, and his compassion for helping to change a young woman's life. I hope someday I am in the position to return the favor. Thank you, Keith.

I also send a warm thank you to my dear wife, Fiona. As global economic conditions sour, my company put me on a plane to China to find and capture new business as China had a measly 9% GDP growth in the 3rd Quarter (and this caused alarm in China as it is the lowest growth in modern history). Compare that to the rest of the world, and soon, speaking Mandrin will become a must to do business in the global marketplace. But I digress. The unfortunate fact is that Apsara's Birthday was on 29th of Oct, and I wouldn't be able to make it after attending Kabita's Birthday in May. Fiona, despite the physical challenges she faces, volunteered to make the trip solo this time to ensure both of our girls know they are both deeply loved.

Fiona troops on each day, and by all accounts, it sounds as if the cosmos all work out for a reason...The one thing my girls needed most was simply mother-daughter time. Fiona and I, as you may have deduced, are connected at the hip. The one downside of the closeness of our relationship is that we are often viewed as a singular entity, with my natural aggressiveness and playfulness sometimes overshadowing the "soft" skills Fiona is so fluent in. This trip has allowed our girls to begin to put the pain of the past behind them, and bond with Fiona as the mother God always intended for them to have. You can tell from the stories Fiona tells me late each night that the girls finally understand why the bond American children and mothers are so strong. We don't beat them. We spend time reading with them. And most importantly, we simply reassure them of their limitless potential. This is something they've never experienced before. I feel very blessed. My only regret is I am unable to see them blossom in person.

Finally, my two cents on meat night. As dedicated readers will know from the "Carnivore Challenge", I had a really rough go of it due to the lack of meat while I was in Nepal for my first stay last December. When I went back in May, I was amazed at how much the boys had grown in just the short period we were away. The first question many of the boys asked me was, "Big Daddy, can we have meat again while you are here?" It made me realize how blessed I was to have a steady diet of animal protein growing up to become the 6'4", 250lb man I am today.

Michael does an EXCELLENT job providing for all the children. But given the lack of consisitent corporate sponsorship, there are financial realities in caring for over 100 children, and meat becomes a luxury item. I made the decision to finance a weekly meet night not only to add to their nutrition, but more importantly as a weekly reward to growing boys who truly appreciate the gift as a reminder "Big Daddy" loves them dearly.

So, to future volunteers, I ask you to respect the fact that this is my gift to the boys. These kind-hearted souls would give you every last piece of meat off their own plate if you are not attentive to what they are doing and allow it. So please, contribute a couple dollars so that extra chicken can be bought. Don't allow your mind to think "150 rupees!", but rather, "Wow! A chicken dinner for $2USD?? I would pay at least $10 for this in the States!" I know budgets are tight, and that you are giving your time freely to these children, but please be respectful that this is a personal gift from me to the boys in appreciation for the difference they have made to my life. I'm more than happy for you to share in the joy of evening, but please contribute your fair share to keep this going for many years to come.

My best to all,

Tom

Meat night

2008-10-19T08:45:00.000-07:00

Hello Web Wanderers,

Tonight was meat night in the boys' house. After our last trip to Dhapasi, Tom decided that meat night was something he wanted to do for the boys' once a week. I wish he was here to share it with them. It is a highly anticipated evening, and when the meat was ready, they was an excited hush as the boys ate their fill of meat.

It is not often that this group of boys are quiet, they are all so full of spirit; but here we were at meat night and everyone was concentrating very hard of getting every last bit of meat off the bones.

For you foodies out there, Nepali chicken is totally free range. And by that, I mean they run up and down hills foraging for food. This means the meat is rather on the tough side. Also, when you buy it from the butcher, he or she will chop this chicken into bite-sized pieces. It is an amazing process to watch but for a foreigner, the chicken gets a little tricky to eat and work around the little pieces of bones. It is all incredible, wholesome fun.

The most important part is that the boys love it and as Vinod puts it, "It's in my blood!" Vinod or Sabita didi always make this wonderful curry base with tomatoes and onions to cook the chicken in. I believe the base changes every week, which just adds to the excitement of the evening.

Since all of you know how much I enjoy my food and cooking, it was just so joyous to watch them savour every mouthful.

As the boys' and volunteers all share the same home, and have meals at the house, we have requested that if they wish to join in meat night, there is a charge of 150 rps (just under US$2). If they are vegetarian, there of course are other meal options for them.

Sending you much, much love, and going to bed with a happy stomach,

Fi

Where's Dad?

2008-10-16T15:24:00.000-07:00

Dear All,

Some days you wake up and you wonder “What the heck am I doing?”. On Tuesday lunch time I boarded a flight from San Francisco to Tokyo, then had 40 mins to get to my flight from Tokyo to Singapore, followed by Singapore to New Delhi.

When I reached Delhi, the goal was to buy a ticket to get me all the way to Kathmandu. People on the plane thought I was insane, but everyone was very kind. Little did I know just how very hard it is to get a ticket at 5:30 in the morning to KTM. My morning involved running around Delhi airport for 90 mins letting everyone know I wanted a ticket to KTM. I briefly entertained the idea of taking a 55 hour bus ride to KTM, but it didn’t last long.

This was followed by a ride in a taxi into the city center and spending 3 hours with a travel agent who wheeled and dealed me a ticket. Apparently there is an underground market for tickets to KTM at the moment because of the upcoming religious holidays. Travel agents had bought extra tickets in hope of selling them for a premium to wallies like me, and boy, did they clean up today!

There is nothing in the world like a Delhi sunrise, pollution, followed by a Delhi peak hour road closure.

Despite all of this, when I saw the children, it was all worth it.

Of course, as Tom predicted, I was greeting with screams and laughter “Mum!! Welcome to Nepal! Where’s dad??!!??”. None of them quite believed Tom was unable to make this trip. They kept eyeing the gate waiting for his big booming voice. By dinner time, the news spread that yes, Dad really was in China for work then the new question started "Dad is coming after China??" Poor poppets.

I will post pics soon, and updates on life here in Dhapasi - the kids have all grown (especially Purna) and I will work hard at giving out twice as many hugs.

Sending love as always,

Fiona

Back in California ...

2008-06-19T19:45:00.000-07:00

Dear Readers Far and Near,

Here we are, once again back in sunny California and missing everyone in Dhapasi. We miss the laughter of children playing, waking up to the kids getting ready for their morning exercises, and, finding out about their day, while sharing a meal with them.

Since we have been home, Tom has been battling various ailments picked up in Nepal. While there are prescribed medical treatments for everything, there are moments where it just feels like it is going to go on forever.

It reinforces for us, yet again, the wonderful care and love each and every child receives at Papa's House. Because of volunteers and supporters, Michael and his staff are able to look after 75+ children in Dhapasi and Lamahi. Providing them with education, medical care, a sanctuary from the harshness of life in Nepal, and most importantly, heartfelt affection.

Thank you for all the emails and notes people have been sending. Apologies for our tardiness of reply. If you are interested in spending some time with some of the most remarkable children you are ever going to meet in your life, drop Michael a note or visit www.VolunteerNepal.org

Much love as always,

Rugged Journey To Unexpected Blessings

2008-06-05T02:30:00.000-07:00

Dear All,

Some of you may have been wondering what has happened to us in the past week. Well, the short answer is, we took an unexpected trip to the Nepali countryside.

The long story is, on Monday morning, we discovered that Kabita and Apsara needed to return to their village to get registered. Naturally, we volunteered to take them. Unfortunately, we were not 100% clear on what the journey entailed. Nepali people's definition of "near" and "road" is V-E-R-Y different from our own.

We were told the first night we would stay at their maternal grandfather's home, it would be "near" the road that the taxi will drop us. The taxi ride was going to take 2 hours. The next day, we will walk to the girls' village on a "road" to get registered. The reality was the taxi ride took 4.5 hours with Nepal's worst taxi driver, the grandfather's house was a 1 hour hike up a hillside, and the walk to the girls' village was up the side of what I would consider a mountain, 5 hours away. See photo below for a picture of the "mountain".

Since I barely made it up the hill to the house, Tom decided I was to stay in the village. Tom, Kabita, Apsara and two uncles left at 4 in the morning while it was still dark so that it would not be so hot. I spent the first few hours of my morning having all the village children and women observe all my bodily functions and then three hours husking dried corn with the girls' aunt. The rain came down HARD and I was so worried they were going to be swept off the mountain.

When they missed their assigned home coming time, we started sending messages down the hill to see if anyone else had seen them. It was very reminiscent of 101 Dalmatians. It was with great joy, when they finally arrived home close to 3 in the afternoon.

Tom said he just felt blessed that it was such an overcast day with a gentle drizzle or he would not have made it. It was so amazing that they did not experience the same rainfall I had. Apsara never complained once and he was quite certain that she has a billy-goat gene built into her DNA. The "road" over the mountain was basically a vertical staircase carved into the side of the mountain. The uncles and girls just scrambled effortlessly up and down. Tom was 110% sure that there was just no way that I would've made the trip.

As with everything in Nepal, things take a lot longer than planned. We had planned for 2 days, but with lack of transportation and bureaucracy, we stayed from Monday until Thursday. By Wednesday, poor little Apsara was just worn out. I cannot imagine what a tough trip it was on her little body.

It was really wonderful to be able to see first hand the life the girls had before Papa's House. The obvious affection they have for their extended family and the returned affection was lovely. It was wonderful to know that the girls were raised with family who care about them.

The hospitality shown to us by their family was just stellar. They were constantly trying to feed us, but we were usually too hot or too tired to eat. I would've posted more pictures except for the slow internet upload, so we will save those for later.

As always, we send much love,

Fi

Happy Birthday Kabita!

2008-05-31T05:27:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends,

It would appear that we have been celebrating Kabita's birthday for quite a few days but her actual birthday was yesterday. We spent Wednesday, Thursday and yesterday morning teasing her that since the strike was on, there would be no Friday this week. Some of the smaller kids were appalled that a birthday would be skipped, and stomped their little feet and walked me to Michael's birthday list posted on the kitchen door and pointed at Kabita's name and birth date and very indignantly said "Look Mum! Look!"

With a sigh of relief for the little ones, the cake and presents appeared after dinner last night. The cake was another spectacular Papa's House creation. Fruit sponge cake topped with melted chocolate and fresh mango. The ooo's and ahh's of appreciation from the girls and Kancha was just heartwarming.

Kabita's haul of presents included new black and pink sneakers, jeans, blue t-shirt and kulta sulwar, as well as many lovingly made cards and posters from her brothers and sisters.

As promised, today we took Kabita and Aspara for pizza. They could each invite a friend, and Bhumika and Chham joined us. I think the photos speak for themselves as to how much they all enjoyed a trip out to Thamel. Apsara made other diners at the restaurant smile as she waved goodbye to the basin of lotus as she headed out the door.

I know many of you are wondering what is happening with the possibility of bringing Kabita and Apsara to live with us. The reality is, it is impossible. The Nepali government has revised it's adoption law 3 weeks ago, and surprisingly, it is exactly the same as the last set of laws. Nepal is possibly the only country in the world where they would set up research committees and work for a year to produce a new legislation that is a carbon copy of the last one. However, we are still hopeful that Kabita and Apsara can make a trip to Disneyland with us in the near future.

Much love from all of us here in Dhapasi,

Fi

'Ello Yellow

2008-05-28T22:58:00.000-07:00

Dear All,

Life has been very hectic here, thus the lack of blog entries.

Yesterday, today and tomorrow is a general strike, which means there is no school for the kids. You have never seen children so sad at not being able to attend school. They wake up in the morning and still head straight for their textbooks.

Yesterday we took advantage of the hot weather and lack of school to take everyone swimming. The Nature Club is on most maps of Kathmandu and local people that you speak to all know where it is, so I was very surprised to find that the pool was rather small. Nevertheless, the kids all had such a wonderful time splashing for just over two hours. Little Jeny Rai was so exhausted from the whole experience, Oli (one of the volunteers) had to carry her home, fast asleep on his shoulder.

When we got here, we discovered that Apsara's favourite colour was "ello". After two or three tries, her favourite colour is now "yellow". We are very impressed by how hard the girls and all their brothers and sisters are working on their school work and perfecting their English pronunciation. Our Nepali is more than dismal in comparison.

More later,

Fi & Tom.

Girls' Day Out

2008-05-24T06:16:00.000-07:00

Dear All,

Last night our little family marched up the hill with my pillow and sleeping gear. I was invited to a sleepover in Kabita and Apsara's room. Michael has done such a wonderful job with discipline with these kids that even though they had a distraction in their midst, they were all asleep before 9 pm.

This morning, we were up by 5 am and Kabita headed downstairs to start making breakfast. I had the job of cutting beans, potatoes, garlic and onions. I think it is much safer to be in the position of preparation rather than cook after my attempt last year!

Anita, Sunita, Kabita, Apsara and I had planned a shopping trip to Jamal a few days ago. To make sure we left on time, Tom volunteered to complete the washing up instead of Kabita. Didi Dawn Kumari very firmly put her foot down on that notion! She is such a wonderful lady, we both only wish we were able to speak with her in Nepali.

We caught a taxi from Basundhara to Jamal. Apsara has discovered that she really enjoyed the view from the front seat. In Jamal, we went from shop to shop hunting down a purple lengha for Kabita and a pink sari for me. We both completed our shopping trip with clothes we didn't set out to buy - Kabita will now have a silk pink and purple kulta sulwar and I have a silk turquoise sari with a pink and gold border, as well as a brown cotton sari for everyday wear.

Anita and Sunita patiently translated and bargained for us. Once again, I cannot begin to express how wonderful these two young ladies are.

For lunch, Anita introduced us to a dish called samosa chat; talk about spicy! Apsara had tears running down her face and we ordered an extra dish of momo to take the spice away. The ability to have a huge lunch for under US$1 a person is one of the pleasures of Nepal.

As we left in the taxi from Jamal, we saw a street march heading towards us. We left just in the nick of time! Anita tells me it was a congress protest.

The afternoon was spent at Papa House II with Kabita and Apsara, who were both dying to spend time with Dad. The three of them cracked open one of the coconuts I had bought in Jamal and enjoyed some lychees too. It was incredible that a kilo of lychees was cheaper than apples! I know what I am going to feast on from now.

As always, sending much love,

P.S. I had to include a picture of corn in this blog. Every available spot of land is swaying with corn stalks. It is obviously a vegetable that grows easily. And here, it will definitely be consumed as food rather than converted to biofuel. On the way home in the taxi, I saw a vendor grilling corn, I haven't told Tom yet, but I am sure he'll have to pay a visit very soon.

Daddy's Little Girls

2008-05-22T23:39:00.001-07:00

Hello dear Wanderers,

Today finds Fiona and I sitting in the Volunteer kitchen, staring at the rain, and contemplating the last couple days in Nepal. These past few days have been a few of the most memorable of my life.

As Fiona mentioned in her last entry, we've begun spending private time with Kabita and Apsara; separating them from the collective and allowing all of us time to simply get to know each other better. The first afternoon after our walk in the rain, we scurried back to our room, and the girls got changed into Fiona's clothes. Warm and dry, we found a deck of cards and Fiona and I taught the girls the time honored games of "Crazy 8s", "Rummy", and "Go Fish". We were amazed at how quickly the girls picked up the rules and started developing strategy. For two children who never spent a day in their lives in school prior to a year ago, they are amazingly intelligent.

The next day, Fiona cooked us all lunch and we ate together as a family up here in the volunteer kitchen. There was something entirely satisfying about sitting around the table enjoying a hot meal as a family. Family dinners will definitely be a staple of the Gilbert household.

After lunch, we sat down with Vinod and asked him to help translate, as we wanted to talk to the girls about their past so that we could understand where they came from. While the conversation itself was far too personal to share here, Kabita cried as she recounted the horrors she suffered at the hands of her father leading up to her arrival at Papa's House. Apsara sat silently, listening intently, and occasionally whispering in Kabita's ear. With not a dry eye in the room, I asked, "Do you think some day I might hit you, too?" Kabita suddenly sobered up and said, "No, father! I know you would never." "You're right, my darling daughter. I promise to never hit you, and I always keep my promises." By this point, the tears were forgotten and the smiles returned.

The afternoon was finished watching a Bollywood movie, "The Krazzy 4s", which of course the irony was not lost on the girls that they just learned how to play Crazy 8s.

That night was Kabita's turn to help prepared the evening meal. All day, she kept reminding me that I had to have dinner at the first hostel. I wish I had a picture of the look of pride she had on her face when she handed me my plate of food. Despite a stomach still churning from too much curry, it was the most delicious meal I've ever tasted. You could taste the love with each and every bite.

And here's the part that amazes me the most...With 53 children all needing love and affection, there is not an inkling of jealousy radiating from our girls when we hug, kiss, and tell other children we love them. They simply stand there, with sparkles in their eyes, waiting for each of the other children to have their turn before taking up residence again at our side. Even as children, they understand the love we profess for them is different than the love we profess for others, and they are willing to share that affection openly and willingly. I have yet to meet two more generous, unselfish souls. I always thought Fiona was the pinnacle of such traits, but these two girls are infinitely ahead of us both in this regard.

I'm looking forward to the next 2 weeks.

Best,
Tom

The Secret Is Out ... We Are Back in Dhapasi

2008-05-14T13:29:00.000-07:00

Dear Dedicated Readers,

Yes, the rumours are true. We are back in Dhapasi visiting with everyone here at Papa's House. We had told Michael and Vinod to keep our visit a surprise, and boy, were the kids surprised! Vinod picked us up from the airport, having sent the boys up to Papa House I to play. We dropped out luggage off ta Papa House II and headed up to surprise the kids.

We arrived at the gate and there were just shocked faces. They weren't quite sure what to do or what they were seeing. Then the first child screams "Tom-dad" and then the avalanche of hugs and kisses began.

The kids have grown since January. There have been a few changes since we left. All the girls now live at Papa House I and the boys (with the exception of Kancha) live at Papa House II. Both groups are thrilled to be living in a single gender home and the younger ones are definitely benefitting from the wonderful example the older kids set.

Dhal bhat for breakfast is still a bit of a shock to the system but it is a pleasure to be able to dine with the children.

Yesterday Tom, Kabita, Apsara and I headed down to Basundhara for some supplies and were caught in a rain shower. As we were heading down the hill, we were thrilled that the weather wasn't too warm but then the rain drops started and grew and grew. By the time we were half way up the BIG hill, we were pretty much the only ones left on the streets as all the Nepali people had headed to shelter. When we reached Papa House II, the four of us looked like drowned rats!

There is a huge sense that we are coming home when we arrive here in Dhapasi. I cannot begin to describe the intense emotions we are feeling. To see all the children blossoming is just heartwarming. The love the have for each other and their ability to share it will all who come is a fantastic testiment to all the hard work Michael and all the staff here put in.

All our love,

Fi & Tom

For Those Interested in Volunteering

2008-04-24T09:52:00.001-07:00

Dear Soon-To-Be Volunteers,

For those of you who are interested in volunteering at Papa's House, please check out the following website:

http://www.volunteernepal.com/

You can also email Michael Hess directly at: michaelhess@wlink.com.np Michael will be able to give you an up-to-date account of the available projects and the situation in Nepal.

Keep well and happy,

Fi & Tom.

Contact us

2008-03-28T13:12:00.000-07:00

Dear Web Readers,

We have been getting many reports that people have been trying to contact us by leaving comments on our blog or getting in contact with us through friends.

Unfortunately, we have not been able to return message left for us on the blog because most people have not left their contact details.

If you would like to contact us, our email is: TomAndFiona@JourneyToNepal.org

Thanks!

Sending much love as always,

Fi

Home Again but Not Really

2008-01-07T08:27:00.001-08:00

Dear Family & Friends,

We are now home in our condo in California. It is so quiet without the laughter of 50 children playing in the yard.

There were many tears on the last day. As the children were wiping tears from my face, telling me "mum don't cry", I was reciprocating by wiping tears from their little faces. The walk to the taxi was very long and not long enough at the same time.

We thought we would have very organised and co-ordinated goodbyes; we invited each child into the room with us and said private goodbyes. We did not plan for how very heartwrenching the event would be.

Little Jeny Rai, in particular, ripped my heart out. Jeny was always infatuated with Tom and I was just the person who did her hair in the mornings. On the last day, she was not her usual outgoing self. Instead, she was very introspective and kept very close to me. She alternated from wrapping herself around my neck and tugging on my arm whispering "I love you, don't go". I kept asking myself how the children with biological parents could walk away from them without wanting to visit at every given opportunity or find a way to be with them full time.

Every child wrote us letters. They did not help the flow of tears. It became clear that the chidren were intrigued with a married couple who laughted and loved each other. If nothing else, we hope we have left the impression for both boys and girls that a marriage is a partnership rather than an abusive relationship.

Letters from the children have started arriving via email. We are definitely looking forward to watching all of these wonderful children bloom into fantastic adults. One of the first questions Nepali people ask is "Do you have children?", we can now answer "Yes, we have 50". We definitely have left a large part of our hearts in Nepal with the children and all the people who look after them at Papa's House.

If anyone has questions about volunteering at Papa's House or are sitting on the fence about an experience like this, do contact us. Everyone told us it was going to be a trip that would change our lives, they had no idea how right they were.

Sending much love,

Fiona

The Difference a Month Makes

2008-01-04T06:45:00.001-08:00

Dear Friends & Family,

Tonight is our last night in Nepal. It is going to be a sad morning and a very, very long flight home.

It is hard to believe that we have been here 4 weeks and we are leaving tomorrow.

This brings me to Ishwor. “Iggy” arrived at the home a couple of weeks before us. When we first met him he was very standoff-ish and asserted himself by sitting on the younger boys or pushing the girls around. One month on and it is a totally different child.

He has a brilliant smile and is the first in line to give us hugs or to get his hair done (he vehemently refused to have me touch his head when I first arrived). He helps the younger children get ready and with their school work. It is an absolute testament to the love they have received from Mary-Kate, Vinod and everyone here at Papa’s House. Michael has set a wonderful precedent of care and love that each and every child receives.

We will be leaving our hearts behind tomorrow.

Sending you much love,

Fiona

Personal Day

2008-01-03T08:17:00.000-08:00

Hello Everyone,

Fiona's and my day revolved around private reflection. As such, there will be no update for today's events.

Tomorrow is our last full day in Nepal, and the children are already jockeying for our time. Somehow, in the next 36 odd hours, I have to show 50 children that they are loved, cherished, appreciated, and will never be forgotten. I never really stopped to consider the impact on these children's lives of my *leaving*.....

A wrap-up may have to wait until we get home...I anticipate a late night tomorrow.

Best,

Tom

Angels Galore

2008-01-02T06:47:00.000-08:00

Good evening Web Wanderers,

It seems hard to believe that our month in Nepal is rapidly coming to a close. Unfortunately, it seems impossible to introduce you to all of the children in the homes before our departure, but tonight I would like you to meet two other sweet angels that have touched Fiona and my lives.

The first girl is Mary Rai. Mary's real name is Gyahunta, but she quickly latched onto her nickname and made it her own. I first noticed Mary when reading Michael's website; you could tell from her smile that she was an introspective soul. And indeed she is. When we first arrived, I was really looking forward to getting to know her and was a bit disappointed that she seemed to have no interest in me. I could see her give me the occasional glance from a distance, but she would never come in for a hug like most of the children.

But over the past week, she has suddenly warmed up to me, and I've gotten a chance to really see the depth of her personality. Perhaps the jealousy of seeing the affection heaped on the other children became unbearable, or perhaps I somehow unknowingly passed the test for her to open up to me. Now she comes in for big hugs, and I get the Nepali kiss reserved for the most prestigious (a kiss on each check and then on the forehead) and the proclamation ,"Father, I LOVE you SOOOO much!" Mary is actually quite self confident and helps me by translating what I'm saying to the younger children. Yesterday, we took 6 children to get sodas and samosas; Mary amongst them. Mary naturally took a leadership role and helped Fiona and I keep the group together in our single file line. A natural leader - she got the other children to do what we wanted without coming across as bossy.

Her little sister, Rasmita, also joined us on our adventure yesterday. Rasmita is a slight show-off. One of her favorite things to do is play hacky sack with a ball made out of rubber bands (almost all of the kids in Nepal seem to have one) and make sure everyone knows how many times she was able to kick it before it hit the ground. Rasmita warmed up to me much earlier than Mary, but given her English is still quite basic, she isn't able to always communicate what she wants to say and gives up trying despite gentle prodding from me. But she always runs off with a smile, and each night fights her way through scrum to make sure she gets her goodnight hug and kiss.

These are two other girls that could easily be fallen in love with. Both always look upon you with a smile expressing the pure joy and goodness in their hearts. Innocent to the core, they are two angels whose nightly hugs I'm going to miss dearly when we depart on Saturday.

62 hours and counting....

Best,

Tom

Kit Kat

2008-01-01T06:42:00.000-08:00

Dear Family & Friends,

This is Yasoda. She is a girl after my own heart. When we first arrived, she would barely make eye contact but she would always be walking briskly around the house with a stack of books or have her nose buried in her books, studying very hard.

She has picked up English very quickly and has been my very patient Nepali teacher.

She is extremely shy but once she warms up to you, she is just the most lovely soul.

Yasoda is the oldest girl in the new home and the younger girls just hang on to her every word. She sets the benchmark on behaviour and we are pleased to say that she sets the standard very, very high. She has the heart of a leader; she just needs to believe that herself too.

When Tom was allocating new hip-hop names to the children, she was mildly distressed at being named after a chocolate bar but very graciously accepted it since he had picked it for her. Since then, she has developed a skip in her step and loves being called Kit-to-the-Kat.

We both think she is just gorgeous and has model potential but we can see her equally becoming a doctor or a teacher.

I look forward to morning tea and biscuits because I know she would've saved me a seat next to her on the kitchen bench. She still doesn't say much and just likes holding my hand. There are just some things you do not need words for.

Happy New Year!

Fi

New Year's Eve Nepali Style

2007-12-31T06:11:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

It is 8pm Nepali time on New Year's Eve and we are ready for bed. We sure have been painting the town red! The other volunteers have headed off to Thamel to see what they can find in terms of celebrations, but in a country that doesn't celebrate New Year's Eve, it might be slim pickings. We understand that the countdown was completed at 6:30 pm and all bars, pubs and other establishments will be closed at 11, so I don't think we are going to have any hungover volunteers in the morning.

Tonight I would like to introduce you to 2 more gorgeous poppets.

The first is Hari Salami. On our arrival, we discovered he had just made the decision to change his name to "Hari Nepali". The reason being that Salami is the surname of a low caste and he was tired of being teased and bullied. He discovered that many lower caste people have adopted the last name "Nepali", which is not associated with any caste.

I asked Vinod (the house dad) if it was OK to let Hari know that one of my favourite foods was salami and he said "No ma'am, then he will want to change his name back!"

There is a part of me that just cannot conceptualise the impact of the caste system on someone as young as 8. I have been told that the caste system is not as strict in Nepal as it is in India, even so, it just breaks my heart. But I am proud of strong souls like Hari who is taking his life into his own hands, and even at his tender age is making positive changes in his life. Maybe one day, he will help change his world.

Hari is a ham. He has the funniest faces every time he delivers a line. He pauses and waits for the room the laugh. It is very rare to see anything but the most genuine of smiles plastered to his face. Recently, he has been in a race with the older boys to get to the gate to unlock and lock behind us.

This is Sita. She is a fairly recent addition to the family here at Papa's House. Sita makes my heart squeeze with desolation every time I see her. She was dropped off a few months ago with her paperwork. She arrived with her hair shaved (probably due to lice) and it is so lovely to see that her gorgeous locks are growing back in.

On the nights and the mornings I get to spend a few moments hugging her, I get the sense she has so much to say, so much to tell but just hasn't quite got the vocabulary to express herself. So we sit or stand there in each others arms and I just hold her tight and tell her I love her and that she is now safe. There were days when I was almost certain she was never going to let go, but she will snuggle into my neck, squeeze a little tighter and then let go and go play with her sisters and brothers.

It is going to be very tough to say goodbye on Saturday morning.

Much love,

Go Speed Racer, Go!

2007-12-30T06:59:00.000-08:00

Good evening loyal readers and new visitors alike,

Today I got to fulfill a promise I made two weeks ago...After my first attempt to take Hikmat, Saroj, and Chham go-kart racing went up in flames, I made them a solemn promise to make it up to them. I didn't have to as they didn't hold the place being closed against me, but I made the promise nevertheless. And a couple nights ago, Saroj sheepishly reminded me of my commitment even though I hadn't forgotten (but yes, time was slipping by faster than I could keep up). So enough was enough...I got Papa's permission to pick the boys up from school after lunch (they go to school 6 days a week, and Saturday was Fiona's party), and we headed off to the track with Vinod, the gentlemen who is "Daddy" at the second hostel, and Fiona, who made it very clear that I was going to have one pouty wife if I didn't invite her on our boys' day out.

Given how expensive the track is, I was afraid we were only going to be able to do a few minutes each, but Vinod spoke with the owner, and after much pleading for a discounted rate, agreed that he would do a special package for us - 3 cars for 30 minutes. While the price was a lot higher than I originally budgeted (the place caters to diplomats and dignitaries), it was 33% off the published rates, and with the eager looks of anticipation on each boys face, I was easily convinced to agree.

The 3 boys started for the first 15 minutes. It amused me to no end how their personalities matched their driving styles.

Chham, as the Speed Racer lyrics go, was a demon on wheels. The boy has no fear. Just as he dives for every ball no matter the sport or playing surface, he was full throttle the entire time. He was the superstar of the day, and he knew it even if he was too modest to boast.

Hikmat, God bless him, drove like my grandmother. I've never seen somebody sit up so straight or drive so slowly. And boy did we let him know it! But Hikmat never missed a beat...with a smile beaming from his face, I became "Grandson" and Fiona became "Granddaughter". His smile at the end was just a big as Chham's even if he only did half the number of laps.

Saroj was in the middle of the pack. While not as insane as Chham, or as cautious as Hikmat, he had a few good crashes as he figured out how to handle the kart. Remember, none of these boys have ever been behind the wheel of anything...Never having the driver's ed we each got as a child on Mr. Toad's Wild Ride at Disneyland. Saroj was consistently ALL over the course, flailing from side to side, desperate to keep control.

Now that each of the boys got a "crash" course, Fiona and Vinod got behind the wheel and started racing each of the boys in 5 minute intervals. Fiona stunned everyone (except for me) by her driving prowess. The girl drives a Mustang after all, and is quite ept at taking corners at 50mph! Try as the boys might, they just couldn't keep up with my pint-sized Mike Wallace.

Vinod however was able to give Fiona a run for her money. Like Chham, he had no fear, but the increased upper body strength helped him navigate the corners at a higher velocity than his peers.

With 5 minutes remaining, Fiona pulled into the pit, and I got goaded into finishing the race. Mind you, while I have been go-kart racing before, it was probably about 25 years ago, and I spent most of my time in the wall. I didn't want to shatter the illusion that I knew what I was doing by having a repeat performance of the track staff constantly pulling me off the wall.

And sure enough, at the first hair-pin turn I spun out and crashed hard. I worked hard to keep from turning red as I was admonished in Nepali for driving like an idiot. But always one to learn from my mistakes, I figured out the handling, and within a minute was tearing up the track like there was no tomorrow. I was weaving and bobbing through traffic and sending my competitors into the wall (OK, occasionally I got a little too competitive and tried to accelerate into holes 3 inches too narrow and chirped off the wall myself as I squeezed by). While I by no means hold the track record, I clearly had the fastest laps of the day. And hey! I easily carry an extra 50 kilos over Vinod...imagine how fast I would have been if I wasn't lugging around that extra spare tire. :)

All in all it was a fantastic day enjoyed by all. While I feel bad that the cost of such makes it prohibitive for them to enjoy this again in the near future, it clearly is an experience they will be talking about for years to come. Like a child's first trip to Disneyland, there is something entirely satisfying by watching the awe on their face as they experience something beyond their wildest imagination. It's that joy that makes it all worthwhile.

Namaste,

Tom

P.S. Fiona and I sparked a flurry a couple days ago with our posting regarding the Basnet sisters. While we appreciate everyone's excitement and encouragement, a couple clarifications need to be made:

1) Nepal currently does not have any legal method for adopting children. Part due to political upheaval, and part due to not meeting international criteria for foreign adoptions, there has been a moratorium on all new adoptions out of Nepal. While there is some hope that the new Parliament will address this issue, it would be foolhardy to attach a timeline to such given how everything moves in "Nepalese time".

2) As mentioned in the posting, Fiona and I would have to feel as if God truly put it in our hearts to adopt rather than simply being caught up in the moment. As many of you know, Fiona and I agreed before we got married not to have children. I personally feel ill-equipped to help guide a child through their formative teenage years given that I barely survived my own. "Survival" is the only way to describe it as I have no insights as to how to help a child raised in America how to navigate that period of their lives, let alone somebody from a much more innocent cultural upbringing. We do love these girls, but only time and prayerful consideration will determine whether adopting these two angels is a part of our Journey. We don't feel the need to "save" these girls...They are very well taken care of by Papa and are receiving an excellent education. The question really becomes whether the real reason Fiona and I felt so strongly about not having children was due to our feelings of inadequacy to raise children, or if it is all a complex part of destiny allowing us to have an open spot in our hearts and lives for Kabita and Apsara. If God calls upon us to adopt, we'll love them as deeply and surely as if they were our own, but the time is not now. Whether the time will come is a question yet to be answered.

A Birthday to Remember

2007-12-29T05:17:00.001-08:00

I had heard rumours of a birthday party but it was all very quiet last night so I was thinking I was about to have a quiet day.

At 9 this morning, a truck rolled into our yard and the kids went tearing out the front door. The caterers had arrived.

I had to pretend very hard not to notice the commotion and head up the hill to the other home. There we watched a Nepali movie and I had a 5 minute nap on Binu's nap.

The children had their regular Saturday tiffin meal of rice flakes and curd. I have to admit, I am game to try most food in Nepal but I do have to pass on the curd.

After tiffin the kids all got ready and we headed back down the hill to play. Dinner was to be served at 4 pm while there was still light.

Anita and Sunita decided that I needed to be put into a sari to look truly Nepali. Good thing I had come well prepared (thanks Mum!).

The dinner buffet consisted of dhal bhat, goat curry, mutton skewers, fruit salad in yogurt and Nepali sweets. Some neighbours came to join in the festivities but the absolute highlight for me was watching the kids eat their fill and then go back for seconds ... and thirds ... and more.

There were many sighs of appreciation and I have to admit it was the best dhal bhat I have eaten in Nepal!

When I was young, my mum had always sighed "Wait until you are a mum, then you will understand." I had never believed her but today I finally understood what she meant. I have carefully stowed into my suitcase 50 handmade birthday cards. Each made with love. I had never understood how a mother could be so thrilled by and display with so much pride wrinkled, straggly, pieces of paper glued together. Today I understood. Each card was painstakingly created with hearts of gold. I am truly loved.

So I now head off to bed at 8pm, stomach filled, and heart overflowing.

Many, many, many thanks to Vinod who organised the whole event with a day's notice!

I love you all & thank you for all the wonderful wishes for my birthday,

Fi

Basnet Sisters

2007-12-28T02:56:00.001-08:00

Dear Friends,

Tonight I would like to introduce you to two very special little angels.

In the mornings, on the days I can make it up the hill to greet the children and walk them to school, we pass a little Hindi shrine at the gate of one of our neighbours; Kabita Basnet will stop, ring the bells to invoke the god and places a tikka blessing on my forehead. Of late, Tom has also been a recipient on these morning blessings.

Kabita and her sister Apsara have only been at Papa’s House since April of this year. They were located at a refugee camp with their mother who did not want them. I cannot imagine anyone not wanting to provide a home for these two gorgeous girls. Their mother came to visit in the summer and left after stealing all of the girls' new clothes. You wouldn't know from daily interactions with them that they have had anything but a blessed life.

Apsara is 10 and is a little shy but has fledgling leadership qualities. She is her room's captain and organises all the other smaller girls into their night clothes and tucks them into bed ready for the goodnight rounds. Of late, she has started sharing her bed with Sita to keep warm. Tonight a new little girl joins the home and she will be moving into Apsara's room. I have no doubt she will be welcomed with open arms and cared for very well.

Kabita (13) has a quick wit and has picked up English very, very well. I would've pegged her as having several years' of English education under her belt, not just a few months. Academically, she places 1st in her class of 50 students. I have a very, very soft spot in my heart for Kabita.

Today it was half-Holi and we were able to take the girls down the hill to get a couple of samosas, soda and crisps. They decided it was an occasion to really dress up in their best lingas and we made quite a spectacle heading up and down the hill. I tried very hard to make sure Apsara's linga didn't drag through the mud and water puddles but I don't think we were very successful. Her beautiful black skirt came home crusted in the brown and grey mud that is Kathmandu valley. We truly had a wonderful afternoon with some lovely young ladies.

I very much look forward to watching them continue to bloom. Should God ever put it in our hearts to adopt, and Nepalese law is changed to allow the adoption of siblings, Kabita and Apsara would certainly be extended an invitation by Tom and I to join our household.

With love,

Fi

Male Bonding: Part Deux

2007-12-27T02:33:00.000-08:00

Good evening Web Wanderers,

Today was by all accounts a "typical" day here in Nepal, but those are exactly the days that teach the life lessons I came to Nepal to learn.

From left to right we have Kancha (5), Maila (8), and Sandesh (10), the three sons of the cook didi, Dawn Kumari. I don't know Dawn's story, nor do I dare ask, but she's a single mom raising three *very* spirited young men. As she works her tail off caring for the 36 children in the first hostel, her boys are always the first to greet us at the gate each morning when we arrive to spend a few minutes with the children before walking them to school.

I never really gave the importance of their greetings each morning much thought until today. I don't know what it was about today in particular, but I reckon it must have been the look in the boys' eyes that finally tipped me off that they weren't simply rambuncious young boys who saw a living jungle gym, but rather desperate for male attention.

When we first met Kancha, both Fiona and I thought his name was Bipen. Each morning we would greet him, and he would complain insistently about something in Nepali that neither of us could understand. It was more than a week into our stay that somebody finally heard his protests and informed us that his name was in fact Kancha. But despite our complete lack of intelligence, he never held it against me, and spent any time he could hugging me, teasing me to pick him up, or simply pushing other kids away so that he could cuddle in by my side.

Maila is the shy one of the three. He takes a backseat to Kancha, patiently waiting his turn, should Kancha be distracted long enough to take his place on the Super Bounce Machine (The boys like to pretend they're jumping while I lift them high above my head.) Never to be seen with a frown, each morning begins with, "I love you, Father."

Sandesh is the generous soul of the three. While he is very happy to hold my hand and play with me like the others, he also seems aware that his brothers need the time with me as well. Every day since we've arrived, Sandesh has presented us with a present. It is usually a paper airplane, but plastic toy soldiers and heat seeking missiles off a long broken helicopter have also found their way into our pockets. We try to insist that he take them back, but he is adamant that we MUST keep his gift.

And so it dawned on me that these young boys need my attention just as much as the older ones. Sure our conversations are in words rather than sentences, and I surely cannot impart life wisdom on them, but just having a man pick them up, rough house with them, and then tell them that he loves them has just as much impact as affirming the older boys dreams. Seeing me not hitting girls, or waiting my turn in the food line are just as important of life lessons. Each lesson doesn't have to be a philosophical vision of the world... Sometimes the most important lessons are those where they simply mimic your actions until they become habits of their own.

In the end, I figure I'm learning more than I'm teaching, so this is the cheapest tuition I'll ever come by for the quality of the education. While I do admit I sincerely miss the comforts of home, the trip was a critical stop on my life's journey. I guess that means I need to start thinking about my next tattoo. Your suggestions are welcome and appreciated.

Best,

Tom

Twins from Terai

2007-12-26T06:50:00.000-08:00

Dear Family & Friends,

Tonight I would like to introduce you to Anita and Sunita who are both 17 and from the Terai region of Nepal. We were very surprised to find out that they were twins because not only do they look nothing alike, they also have very different personalities.

Anita and Michael met us at the airport. Anita immediately took to insisting on carrying my hand luggage and my jacket.

Over the past two weeks I have come to rely on Anita as my guide through the shopping mazes of Kathmandu and on Nepali culture. She is street smart to the core and would make a wonderful ISA for Tom's SSIP group at Maxim. She speaks 4 languages and has only recently added English to her repertoire. I truly believe she would take America by storm if given the chance.

Anita knows the value of things. She makes me laugh when we negotiate. A price will be agreed on and while the vendor is placing the items into a bag, she will try for more rupees off. Occassionally I will tell her how much I would be willing to pay and she will think it is too much money but instead of arguing with me, she will just set a lower price and work up to what I am prepared to pay. Usually I leave paying a lot less and she will flash me a grin and a wink. I love her tenacity and vigorous spirit. Unfortunately Anita suffers from chronic pain and doesn't like to take her medication; she is a girl after my own heart.

Sunita attends the local high school that is taught in the Nepali medium. She didn't feel that she would do as well in a school that taught in English. She is a romantic dreamer. She doesn't walk, she floats. Like her sister, she has a heart of gold and would never think ill of anyone. While Sunita calls me "mummy", Anita calls me "sister". Sunita reminds me of a very young and innocent part of myself.

I cannot begin to describe how wonderful these girls are. They are so kind, so welcoming and ever so generous.

Sending lots of love,

Fi

More Pictures

2007-12-25T06:32:00.001-08:00

Yeshorda & her new bear. Rajan & his new monkey - they haven't left each other's side today so hopefully the monkey will help calm his night terrors.

Iggy & his new car. Tom & Depa showing that Tom is "Santa in training"/

Sita and her new winter wrap. Michael taking a few minutes' break.

Hari and Purna's puppy (it was a very popular puppy). Cila and her new watch.

Christmas Collage

2007-12-24T22:55:00.000-08:00

Bursting to get into the present room.

Since everyone has been greatly anticipating Christmas photos, this entry is just going to be a collection of pictures of the kids and their gifts.

Thank you to all of you who helped make this happen. I will admit, I was panicking as the kids were getting their present for fear that someone was going to miss out entirely because despite going through the Christmas list multiple times, someone got skipped. Anyway, apart from a couple of sizing issues, which will be resolved over the next few days, everyone was accounted for.

Purna & his new "puppy".

Group shot as they are waiting to open presents. My favourite photos of the day; my little Hugh Hefners in their bathrobes.

"Baby" Anita trying to figure out what she got for Christmas (bathrobe).

Anita & her prezzies. Ashok & the new cricket bat for the home.

Mary opening her presents. Sumitra and her new bear.

Sabita and her new jacket; she looked like a beauty pagent contestant. Bhumika will all her new sleeping companions.

I will post more pictures tomorrow because the internet connection is just super SLOW!

Sending lots of love from Papa's House,

Not a Creature was Stirring...Well, Maybe One...

2007-12-24T12:53:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas dear Web Wanderers,

I must still be a child at heart...Here it is, 2:30am in the morning, and I'm bright eyed (and I can't even blame it on jet-lag!). Who knew that at 34 years old, I could still get excited about opening presents on Christmas morning, especially when none of the presents have my name in either the "To" or "From". Just the eager anticipation to see each child's face as they see how much Santa loved them this year.

Wow, what a difference 2 weeks can make. While I still am resolute that Fiona and I made the right decision not to have children of our own, I have gotten a peek into the joy and pride each of you must feel each time you gaze into smiling eyes. Combined with the utter responsibility of young men looking for clues as to how to proceed on their journey to manhood and young ladies looking for the traits they will one day search for in a partner of their own, and it's almost overwhelming. As most who know me would agree, I'm the last person these children should look to as a role model, and it's certainly not role I'm comfortable with. But I trust that God helped put me here for a reason, so I will do my level best to be the man Fiona fell in love with 13 years ago, and hopefully the children can incorporate that small nugget into their own lives and not be burdened with the rest. Even if it's simply that Fiona's and my purpose to be here is to show the children how two people can truly love unconditionally and equally, despite all of their imperfections and blemishes, then the trip will be a success.

It's just past 3am, and if I'm to survive the marathon ahead, I should try to get a few more hours of sleep. God Bless each and everyone you. So, dear friends, I close in my most hearty voice,

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!

Tom

Adrenaline Rush

2007-12-23T06:41:00.000-08:00

Tonight was the first night I was truly scared while in Nepal. While conceptually we understood the current political climate was less than stable, our experiences to date have been nothing short of mundane.

As Fiona and I were walking back in the dark to the 2nd orphanage after saying our good nights at the 1st, I saw a pack of men approaching just as we arrived at the orphanage gate. The gate locks from the inside, and you have to wait for somebody to come let you in. I quickly rang the bell, hid Fiona behind me, and nonchalantly wielded her walking stick as the men drew closer.

The futility of my defense became ever apparent when it became obvious that it wasn't a pack a street thugs, but rather young Maoist soldiers (some looked as if they just hit puberty), all heavily armed with AK-47s and enough ammunition around their necks to rival Mr. T's jewelry. So there I stood, watching at least 100 soldiers (I kid you not) march pass, completely helpless should one decide that my presence was somehow offensive, praying for the gate to open.

The gate did open, and Fiona and I quickly slipped inside, without incident, but it did highlight that we weren't at Summer Camp. This is real life...How well would you react to armed rebels marching down your street in the middle of the night? Things we cannot fathom until it happens to us is just a simple reality to the locals. The ability to take a night time stroll with Fiona in Mountain View suddenly has a new appreciation.

Sorry for the lack of a picture, but I have nothing appropriate, and pulling out my camera at the time strangely didn't cross my mind.

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve....Sitting around watching Christmas movies and eating chocolates with the children is sure to lower my blood pressure back to normal levels.

Best to all,

Tom

HipHop in 'Da House

2007-12-22T06:14:00.001-08:00

We are not sure if the little kids are excited about Christmas yet but they sure are loving the Christmas movies but the last few days the little ones at the new home have been crazy over their new "HipHop" names.

Everyone here is crazy about HipHop or what they perceive as HipHop. Tom saw Dhiraj one morning and in the big NBA introduction voice said, "It is Deeeee-raj!" From then on, all the other 13 kids wanted their own new names.

So, it gives us great pleasure in introducing our new HipHoppers:

Dhiraj: Big D or just "D"
Ashok: A-Bomb
Purna: Happy (he was most unimpressed by Panther and insisted on Happy)
Ashika: Lil Miss Sunshine
Bhumika: Bee-Bop
Sabina: Sapphire
Sumitra: Yogi
Roshan: Shaggy
Hari: H-Bomb
Jeny: Jenny from the Block
Ishwar: Iggy
Tilak: T-Bone
Yeshorda: KitKat
Rajan: Eyeball
Vinod (House dad): Bollywood
Mary-Kate (House mum): Captain Nemo

If Christmas morning is anything like the past few days (and I am sure it is going to far exceed) it is going to be insane in the most wonderful way.

Sending love from Nepal,

Tommy-G and Fifi-G

Gifts From the Heart

2007-12-21T06:23:00.000-08:00

Dear World,

This morning was like every other morning in Dhapasi. We had tea and biscuits with the kids in our house and then got ready to take on the day. We headed up the hill to walk the other kids back down the hill for school.

On arrival at the yard, Binu told me my neck looked cold. She showed me her scarf and asked if I knew how to make one. I said yes, I know how to knit and crochet but her scarf was very pretty. She mentioned that her mum had made it for her but she had another one in her room and this one was for me.

I was just blown away. Just the day before she had handed over her last half handful of makai (Nepalese corn kernels that have been burnt & a few get popped along the way) that her mother had sent down from Gorkha with a volunteer who had visited her village. These are all extremely precious treasures for Binu, yet she is more than willing to share with a virtual stranger.

I was telling Tom about the makai and he stated that he is always amazed that the children with the least are the most eager to share.

I tried to return Binu's scarf, not because I did not appreciate the gesture but because it was too large a treasure to accept. Instead of taking it back, she proceeded to tie it into a tighter knot around my neck with the instruction of not to take it off. The only way I know how to repay such generosity is to crochet her a new blue scarf since it is her favourite colour.

Binu's generosity outstrips her remarkable athletic ability. I am almost almost convinced that the kids from Gorkha are born with an extra athletic gene. She is part of the group who wakes up for their 5:30 am karate class. We have been to watch the karate class and let me tell you, it is C--O--L--D at that time of day!!

I tear up every time I think about this morning and I know I will cherish this little blue scarf for many many years to come.

With a happy heart,

Fiona

Quick Update: The Carnivore Challenge

2007-12-20T16:58:00.000-08:00

Dear Family and Friends,

I just wanted to let you all know the Carnivore Challenge was a huge success. We raised just over $2,000, which of course we're receiving the match on! For all those who contributed, THANK YOU! I think I'm now officially a vegetarian.

You guys are awesome. The kids are going to have a marvelous Christmas. With the additional funds, each child is getting a new pair of winter slippers, gloves, bathrobe, and a watch (Fiona found a great deal on "Baby G"s). We got a basketball, and I'm currently looking for a hoop (may have to have one custom made by a welder) and we'll pick up a couple Cricket sets as well (yes, it pains me deeply, but what can you do?).

Merry Christmas to all,

Tom

Male Bonding

2007-12-19T06:25:00.000-08:00

Hello again, Web Wanderers,

To follow up on my adumbration from last night (yes, I'll wait a moment for you to grab your dictionaries), I wanted to share with you my experiences with the older boys of the house.

From left to right, we have Chham, Saroj, and Hikmat.

Chham is a 13 years old, and comes from a long line of Gorkha warriors, and boy, you can see it. At 13, Chham is already SOLID. When he shakes your hand, it's already a manly shake. When he gives you a hug, you can feel the raw power he possesses. My guess is under the right environment, he would grow up to be a Heisman Trophy Linebacker.

Saroj, at 14, is the comedian of the three (but they're all quite funny). You would never guess that this is the boy that had to escape a Maoist compound in the middle of the night and navigate the jungle on his own to freedom. He always has this smile on his face, but he really cracks up when the situation warrants. Today, we were walking down the street together as we passed this group of women. They all smiled, and we exchanged our "Namaste"s, and continued on our way. The women were talking and laughing amongst themselves as they walked away, and Saroj, got the biggest, brightest smile on his face and started teasing me, "Ooooooooh, they all think you're SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hand-some!!!" Supposedly, the women were commenting that I was largest, most handsome man they had ever seen. Mind you, these were all 40-50 year old women, and the irony wasn't lost on Saroj.

Hikmat, at 16, is the most introspective of the three. Although he is not as athletically inclined as Chham, or as outgoing as Saroj, he has impressed me as a very kind soul. He was the first to share his chips and soda with other children, both in the neighborhood and at the home. Hikmat also has an eye for fashion. He joined the sewing class and is quickly growing quite talented on that front.

When I first arrived, it was quickly apparent that these young men had hearts of gold. But, I found the constant stares, often times from within my personal space, uncomfortable to say the least. Chham in particular intently stares and hangs on my every word, while inching closer and closer as if I won't notice. Then the realization hit me that he's desperate for adult male role models, which is short supply. Here's a young man, separated from his village, whose only male role model is a man who has to share his attention across 50 children. The orphanage itself is heavily weighted towards young girls (as they are generally the most at risk), and the entire staff for his home is female. Combine that with the fact that 95% of volunteers are women, and I suddenly became on the very few people that can help teach him how to grow up into the man he's destined to become. I remember a very lost 17 year old, who Destiny delivered to a small town in the Blue Mountains west of Sydney. There, Jim Hulbert took him in as a son and for the first time in his life made him accountable for his actions and showed how much one could accomplish by channelling his temper into a positive force of change. I can never pay Jim back for what he did for me....All I can possibly do is try to pay it forward.

So today, the four of us sat on a park bench, drinking soda and scarfing down potato chips, and talking about anything and everything. We talked about men and women being equal, but opposite, and the importance of finishing their education and establishing their career before pursuing a family. Chham and Saroj shared their dream to be airplane pilots so that they could travel the world. You could see on each face the power of having their dreams affirmed. But more so, the simple fact that they got 2 full hours of my undivided attention. Just us men, doing what men do best....teasing each other over who the other has a crush on.

They're going to grow up to be outstanding men, in the truest sense of the word.

Best,

Tom

Bittersweet Evolution

2007-12-18T01:02:00.000-08:00

Good evening Web Wanderers,

Today was the day the children suddenly lost their sheer fascination with me. Actually, it started last night, so let me regress...

Each night, since men are not allowed in the girls' rooms, I have been hosting star gazing sessions on the top floor balcony with the girls from individual rooms. It started out with a few of the girls seeing me taking the boys up to look at the moon with Michael's telescope, and quicker than wildfire, every girls' room was jockeying for a position. So each night, in the freezing cold, I've been sitting up there, helping the girls look at the craters on the moon, and using the opportunity to speak to each of them about the importance of believing in themselves and their dreams. Even if they didn't entirely understand what I was saying, they hung on every word I had to say. I figured even if they they didn't completely understand that evening, a seed was at least planted that would eventually bloom in the knowledge that they are indeed good enough to become the doctors, teachers, nurses, and astronauts they dream of becoming. Each night, I've had to eventually send the girls to bed because they would have stayed up there all night, alternating between looking at the moon and warming up in my arms, if I had allowed.

Then last night, the girls whose turn it was in the rotation came up for their astronomy lesson. Each was very excited to see the moon, but much less so in my conversation with them. I wrote their desire to quickly escape back downstairs to the cold evening air and was secretly quite pleased myself to escape the chill so early.

This morning, however, it became clear a metamorphic change had taken place. Jeny, one of the tickle bunnies, goes bananas every morning when she sees me; running up to me, jumping up and down to be picked up, and then using me as a personal jungle gym. Today when she saw me, she greeted me very politely and then returned to whatever it was that had her interest at the time. Then Ashika and Rajan, both of whom usually fight over who gets to stand on my feet this morning, gave me a similar welcome...A very warm good morning, and then racing off to their own activities.

Not exactly sure what to make of it (but not complaining either as my knees and back gave a mutual sigh of relief), I made my way up to the first home to interact with those children before walking them to school. As I arrived, I got the initial rush of "Hello, Father!" with warm hugs, but 5 minutes later, I suddenly realized that for the first time since I stepped onto that playground 1 1/2 weeks ago NOBODY was latched onto me. Nobody was vying for my affections. Nobody was showing off their hacky sack skills, or demanding that I watch them do a back flip. I was simply standing there watching the children happily playing amongst themselves, seemingly impervious to my presence.

Here I was, finally getting what I had been secretly wishing for for the last several days. So why was it so bittersweet? With all of my interactions with children in my adult life, I have been a novelty...Never more than a couple hours at a time, so I have always been the newest, biggest, most amazing thing they've ever seen. Somehow, in the last 24 hours, I became such a fixture in their lives that my presence no longer jolts them from their daily routine.

After a few moments of contemplation, I'm OK with that. Sure, there is instant gratification that comes from having children desperate for your attention, but there is a much deeper gratification when the children become so comfortable with you that they don't feel as if the moment is going to be lost. The lesson learned is that it doesn't mean they appreciate me any less, but rather they have installed me as an integral part of their lives. It's going to make leaving nearly impossible. I can count on the fingers of one hand the number of times I have cried in my adult life. On January 5th, I'll be moving on to my second hand.

I have other thoughts to share with you, but I think I shall end this entry on that note, and save the rest for another day.

All the best to you and yours,

Tom

The Toy Maker of Jamal

2007-12-17T06:55:00.000-08:00

Hello World!

What a wonderful day! Anita, Nora (volunteer from Canada) & I did a mega shopping trip today. It started off at the clothes shop where we ordered 50 bathrobes, 50 pairs of gloves, 16 pairs of jeans & 14 t-shirts.

Then we stopped to price out Christmas trees and toys at Namaste market and flooring for the new shed/schoolroom at a different store.

We saw Bisha (the regular taxi driver for the orphanage) looking for a fare so we were very happy to flag him down to take us to Jamal. On my shopping list was 22 soft toys. After my experience with the slippers, I wasn't holding my breath. After 2 shops, I was starting to think I was going to spend all day there. The toys were of poor quality and the faces were a little scary.

I detoured into a stationery store and as I came out, noticed giant stuffed monkeys and dogs hanging out of a window across the street. After asking around on how to get to the second floor of the building, we ventured down an alley and up a dark stairwell.

We walked into a toy making shop. We had found the toy maker of Jamal. I was thrilled beyond belief.

He told us to pick all toys we needed and then we could discuss the price. I was a little tentative but after picking all 22 toys we needed, he started listing of the prices. 80 rps, 110 rps ... I was trying so hard not to show how happy I was. The toys at Namaste market started at 250 rps and were not half as well made as these ones.

So we now have 22 toys, sitting in the storage room waiting to be wrapped and sent off to their new "parents" to be loved and hugged and to keep their "parents" safe through the darkness of the night.

I truly cannot wait to see their faces on Christmas morning.

Tonight Tom and I came home from Papa's House to the 2nd home to the sounds of Jose Felliciano singing Feliz Navidad and the kids jumping up and down thrilled at the sight of their first Christmas tree.

Little victories are oh so sweet here in Nepal.

Take care, keep warm and we send all our love,

Disasters of Trivial Proportions

2007-12-15T07:05:00.000-08:00

Dear Family & Friends,

There comes a day in every adventure where things just go wrong over and over and over again and you pray so hard for the day to end so that you can start anew with the morning light. Days where at that moment in time you simply want to cry, but once you stop to breathe and get a good night's sleep, you realize how truly trivial the "disasters" of yesterday actually were in the grand scheme of things.

Yesterday, I was meant to go shopping with the older girls to whittle down the Christmas list and Tom was taking the older boys go-karting. We went our seperate ways around 10:30am, and when we finally re-grouped at 4 pm, we immediately noticed that each other's face just showed the wear of the day.

Tom & the boys took a taxi down to the go-kart speedway. Firstly, their meter was rigged and a 100 rps. ride turned into a 500 rps ride. So after fuming over that, they turn around and notice that the go-kart track is closed for the day since it was Holi! Tom was DEVASTATED! But the boys just shrugged and shook their heads in the South Asian fashion and said "OK". They took a bus back to Namaste market and were treated to soft drinks and potato chips. Tom couldn't believe how his big treat for the boys was just shot to pieces and the boys didn't complain once. They just felt happy that they were out for the day and Tom had spent time with them.

Nirmala, Sangita, Bino, Samjhana & I headed out to Jamal to get 33 pairs of winter slippers for the kids since they are just having plastic flipflops at the moment and their little feet are just freezing cold. It was quite an amazing experience dealing with the various vendors. 1 slipper was 90 rps per piece but when I asked for a discount because we were going to buy everything that they had, the price would go up to 110 rps per piece. Huh???

I have to admit, I threw a bit of a tantrum 2 hours into the process and we had bought nothing. I couldn't communicate with the vendors directly to tell them exact what I wanted and what I was prepared to pay, or even for that matter, what I thought of them. Now, little Bhumika has developed her own sign language system. Frustrated and at a loss, I flipped a vendor what I now call "Flipping a Bhumika"; you clap your hands and swing one hand up and ending in a "L" shape finger point.

Here is a picture of Bhumika demostrating.

We did manage to buy all the slippers we set out to get but it took several vendors to fill the order and negotiating with many more vendors over the price.

However, we didn't manage the 50 bathroboes, 50 gloves and mittens, 12 t-shirts or 20-odd teddy bears. I felt like a shopping disaster!

I had volunteered to cook for the entire home. I was going to make chow mein topped with egg and chicken and chilli. After the exhausting shopping trip, I thought making dinner for 37 kids and 3 didis and 2 volunteers was going to be the calming exercise I needed to unwind. I think some days I am just crazy.

Tom tells me it was prehaps the worst meal I have ever cooked in my life. The children were trying to figure out how to eat their dinner and be thankful and polite to me.

Let me tell you, there is no worse feeling in the world than when you think you are sending children to bed hungry because you sucked in the kitchen.

When I went it to tuck them into bed, I was hugged and kissed and loved with abandon and thanked profusely for cooking dinner. By the time I made it to the last room, I couldn't contain my tears. These children hold no grudges, they love unconditionally and are so forgiving. Despite every boo boo, tantrum & miscalculation we managed to make in a day, the love and the kindness shown to us is truly breathtaking.

My lesson for the day has been that something done from the heart, with great intentions, should it meet a disaster, the receiver will still receive it in the spirit in which it was intended. Our real job in the next 3 weeks we have left here is to continue loving them and reminding them how very special they all are.

From my heart to you,

Happy Birthday, Dear Depa

2007-12-14T16:58:00.000-08:00

And a good frosty morning to you, Web Wanderers,

It's Saturday morning here in Nepal, and after a couple hours of work this morning on some of the business / accounting tasks given to me, I have a few minutes to share with you a most remarkable day yesterday.

Yesterday, we finally had the opportunity to celebrate Depa's birthday. We met Depa our first night (her birthday), and when asked what she would like for her birthday, she replied, "I really would like to go out to a restaurant and eat American food." So we scheduled a trip to "The Roadhouse", probably the most famous Western restaurant in Kathmandu. They serve everything you can imagine, from Pizza to Burritos to Steak to TGIF styled Potato Skins. Depa had one more request; she asked if it would be possible for her brother and sister, Roshan and Cila (who also live at the orphanage), could attend as well. How could we possibly say no to that?

So we hired a taxi for the afternoon and drove into the Thamel district. Upon entering the restaurant Roshan's face lit up like a Christmas tree. It was only then that we discovered the Roshan had *never* been to a restaurant (of any kind) before in his life. While Depa and Cila have been long term residents of Papa's House, Roshan had continued to live with his father in a nearby holy place that has become a slum for the impoverished. It was only with the acquisition of the new house that there was a bed available for him.

We sat down at the table and told the kids they could order anything they wanted on the menu. Roshan was the first to loudly whisper "PIZZA!!! With EVERYTHING!" Depa ordered the spaghetti, and Cila the chicken kabobs. When asked what they wanted to drink, they all carefully studied the menu and came back with a single response, "Chocolate Milkshake!"

I just wish I had my camera out when Roshan's pizza was delivered. It was 14 inches in diameter...The only things wider at the table were his eyes and smile. Multiple the following picture by 100, and you'll have a pretty good idea of his expression.

Fiona and I were amazed at how much food these kids could pack away. Depa and Cila finished their plates and each had a slice of the Hawaiian pizza Fiona and I ordered for the table (yes, I gave the Ham to Fiona). Roshan got halfway through his pizza before pooping out, but also had a slice of the Hawaiian as well. At this point, Cila found my sunglasses on the table and start playing with them. When Fiona pulled out her camera, Cila struck a movie star pose.

When then waddled down the street, our bellies far too full, when Depa shyly asked, "Would it be ok if we have a slice of chocolate cake?" Stunned that they could possible eat another bite, we agreed, and had the taxi driver drive us to a bakery, where Fiona and I sat in awe as each child polished off an entire slice of Black Forrest cake.

Our day ended with each child picking a wool cap (like the Peruvian ones you see at REI) we saw a box of for 90 NPR each (~$1.50). The kids were thrilled for the colorful additional warmth, and ran back telling each of their friends how amazing their day was. When was the last time you got that excited over a Combination pizza and a watered down milkshake?

In closing, I want to extend a very warm thank you to all who have contributed to the Carnivore Challenge so far and to encourage those who are thinking about it to go ahead and pull the trigger. The dollar for dollar match is still in place, but only for a short period longer. If a pizza can create so much joy, imagine the thrill of Christmas morning awakening to presents of their very own.

Best of the season to y'all,

Tom

Caste-less Beauty

2007-12-13T21:36:00.000-08:00

Hello World!

One our first night here, I sat down for dinner next to a girl named Kabita. Her first question to me was "Do you know what caste is?", followed by "Do you have caste in Australia?" and "Do you care what caste I am?"

Most of the children at both homes are from lower castes and even though they are young, they have been laughed at, treated poorly and ignored just because of their surnames and the colour of their skin.

Today I am introducing you to Kabita & Kabita M. Two gorgeous girls with wonderful spirits who have been told all their lives that they are not good enough for marriage, not good enough for anything because of the colour of their skin and their caste. Since living at Papa's House, they have come to realise that they can dream and they can be anything they want to be.

Kabita is 12 years old, I am not exactly sure which caste she is in but she is most happy that we don't care. She dreams of becoming an astronaut like Valentina Tereshkova or a doctor if the NASA space program will not accept her. For Christmas she is hoping for a big soft doll to keep her company in bed because she has a recurring nightmare that a man comes and takes her away and chops her feet off. She can hear Michael looking for her in the distance but she cannot get to him because she has lost her feet.

I was shocked to hear about her night terrors because she is such a loving child. She was the first to start calling me "Mamu" (mummy in Nepali) and is always the first to greet us at the gate when we arrive with hugs and kisses. Tom & I are going to make her a dream catcher to let her know that when she sleeps we are looking out for her.

Kabita Mahato is from the Terai region. The Terai is the bread bowl of Nepal but the girls are not considered beautiful because they are "too dark" from working in the fields. She has the most gorgeous smile and kind heart. She wants to be a nurse. Tom and I tell her at any given opportunity how ramri (beautiful) she is. She bursts into a gorgeous smile and start giggling.

Everyday we are in awe and wonder that these children are so well behaved, so well adjusted and so very loving to us and to each other. They are already cross with us that we have been here a week and are leaving in 3 - they want us to stay for at least a year. We love them all very dearly and think we are going to have our hearts broken very hard when we leave.

Sending lots of happy smiles,

The Carnivore Challenge

2007-12-13T07:31:00.001-08:00

Good evening again Web Wanderers,

For those of you looking for Fiona's entry this evening, I must apologize. I had something I just had to share with all of you.

As you've read in the blog so far, I've had a bit of a rough go of it physically so far. A friend recently mentioned to me that my experience sounds identical to boot camp, and I think it's an excellent analogy. Most of the difficulties I shrug off, (like having a heavy blanket on a piece of plywood for a bed), but having no meat in the daily diet is the one area that is really starting to wear on me. Despite being expertly prepared, the smell of curried vegetables is beginning to make me quite nauseous.

The other day, Fiona and I travelled into town to pick up 3 care packages that one of the volunteer's parents sent her. She was busy teaching classes and asked us to pick it up so that they wouldn't mysteriously disappear (which is entirely too common in Nepal). In them were assorted foods for her and supplies for the kids, but what really caught my eye and made my mouth water was the two big bags of beef jerky that was sent to help her survive the next 3 months (she's already been here for 2). That made me think and appreciate all of my close friends that I know any one of them would come to my rescue and send me a box of beef jerky if I asked.

Christmas is coming soon and all of the children have written letters to Santa asking for 4 things they would like for Christmas. Their responses would break your heart. One child asked Santa to bring a doctor to help his crippled friend walk. The other wishes were for things like a new heavy coat since their current one has grown too small. Others asked for school supplies or a new pair of shoes to go running each morning in. Items we consider necessities, are items these children dream about.

So this is my proposal: The Carnivore Challenge. Instead of asking each of you to send me a care package of assorted meat products, I respectfully request that you donate the $50 (or more) you would have spent on food and shipping (it costs $37 just to ship a care package) to ensure these children have a truly blessed Christmas. For every $50 we receive, I PROMISE to go an entire day not bitching and moaning my lack of animal proteins. And here's the best part, a close, personal friend and outstanding individual has agreed to match dollar for dollar ALL contributions up to $2000 submitted as part of this challenge. With 50 kids now, I don't think my pocketbook can do it alone. I can't imagine anything more fulfilling than to make the children believe Santa really cared enough to read their letter and bring them all four things on their list, as well as buy some assorted sporting goods and toys for all to share. I brought a football with me, and despite never seeing one before in their lives, we playing "3 flies up" like pros within minutes.

So please help make their dreams come true at the expense of my ample waistline. Donations can be made via the Paypal link to the left. Just put in the comment section that you would like the funds earmarked for Christmas or the Carnivore Challenge so that we can claim the matching funds and make it a very Merry Christmas for all.

I truly appreciate all of your support. Even if you contributed before, here's a chance to make your money go twice as far and you get my ongoing guarantee that every penny will be spent on enriching these children's lives.

Best,

Tom

Happy Walls

2007-12-12T15:48:00.000-08:00

Good evening my fellow Web Wanderers,

I found out today why Michael was able to get such an amazing deal on the rent of the second house he runs (and of which I'm currently calling home); it turns out that the landlady has never been able to rent this house out for more than a couple months at a time because the house is haunted. A supernatural tenant has pushed each and every family that has come to live in the home.

And sure enough, the first night in the new home, not having been told anything, several of the children reported that a ghost had come into their room in the middle of the night and sat on their chests to study them. Having seen a ghost myself once with Fiona in Australia, I'm inclined to believe their story as it was very similar to our experience. Ghosts are curious, and they want to discover who is sharing their home with them.

Ghost sightings have been way down in the couple months since they moved into the new home from the dilapidated shack the previous chairman had them living in. The youngest boy of the house, Rajan, still gets the occasional visit. At 6 years old, he still gets scared by these nocturnal callings, but just in the last couple days has started to realize that the ghost just wants to be his friend instead of meaning him any harm.

This takes me to one of my great life mantras: Walls absorb energy, both positive and negative. How often have you personally walked into a room and felt either an extreme sense of warmth or an intense uneasiness for no discernible reason? It's the walls. I know it sounds like hocus pocus to some, but truly, if you look at various cultures, it's well documented that intense joys or sorrows will stay with a house, resident to resident, until a new event is powerful enough to overwhelm the previous energy.

And that's exactly what's happened here. The joy, laughter, and love that fills the home has turned malevolence to benevolence. The children have single handily transformed a home that nobody wanted to live in into a house nobody wants to leave. Let's just hope the Landlady doesn't find out!!!

I can't wait for Christmas. The joy, awe, and thrill of Christmas morning will have the walls singing for years to come.

Best,

Tom

Letters to Santa

2007-12-11T07:07:00.000-08:00

Dear Santa,

I want to know how someone could almost starve and abuse these kids to the point where they were planning on running away together.

They sometimes bicker when they want to play with the same item, they get jealous over whose turn it is to get cuddled, but after all they have been through in the past year, they have the most gorgeous spirits and wonderful smiles.

Today was a slow day for me. The walking stick I procured yesterday in Thamel helped with navigating the unpaved roads but my body decided enough was enough. I did get to spend most of the day at the 2nd home getting to know the kids better.

After tea and biscuits at 6 am I started hair braiding and brushing. The boys LOVE having hair oil put on their scalps and getting their hair brushed. I think a lot of it has to do with the personal physical contact as opposed to being ramro (handsome).

Most of the children at the original home had written letters with their Christmas wish list but for this home, it will be their first Christmas. After dinner, Vindo explained who Santa was and how they were to write their wish lists. They were asked to put 4 items that they wanted.

This leads me to introducing you to Purna. Purna is Jeny's brother. When told he could ask for anything he wanted, he asked Santa for a doctor for Bhumika so that she can walk properly. This brought tears to my eyes; Purna definitely embodies the Christmas spirit without knowing it. A doctor would be a blessing to the home. The children are now healthy and have a little bit of meat on their bones but there are just little ailments we wouldn't normally think about - warts, yellowed toe nails, frost bite, skin issues that they have Nepali words for that I cannot begin to describe.

Many of you have asked if you can send money for specific things when I get a list of what is needed and how much it costs. I think this Christmas, we can easily make it a very memorable one for the kids. They are not asking for anything fancy, just things our children in America and Australia take for granted and would never consider putting in a "Dear Santa" letter. Winter jackets, shoes, gloves, socks, bathrobe to keep warm after their cold showers, school bags, colour pencils, their own colouring book.

They have to share pretty much everything and we think it is very important that they have something they can call their own and establish a pride of ownership.

Tomorrow I am going to put 50 letters to Santa into a spreadsheet so that we can quantify what is really going to be needed. I ask that you think about what you might want do for these kids for Christmas.

Sending lots of Christmas spirit,
Fi

Resistance is Futile

2007-12-10T05:34:00.000-08:00

And a fond good evening, Web Wanderers,

Fiona asked me to write today's entry....I guess a few of our frequent readers have started to question whether I would survive the first 48 hours (Thanks, guys!). So here I am, bruised, battered, and amazingly sore (more on that later), but very much alive and kicking.

If 30 hours on planes and in airports wasn't enough to completely throw the body out of whack, the plane ride was a spa treatment compared to the boot camp I was about to enter. While I had tried to mentally prepare myself for anything, I was completely overwhelmed I crossed the threshold of the orphanage. Instantly upon our arrival, I heard a child yell out something in Nepali (which I can only assume meant "Tree!"). Suddenly, I was swarmed by children trying to climb me. Big ones, small ones, young ones, older ones...They just kept coming and coming! Each one was desperate to make an impression. First came endless renditions of Jingle Bells (I really need to teach them some new Christmas Carols!), then came a stream of gymnastic stunts, meant to be bigger and better than the last. Finally, the children would try to one up each other in the title they gave me. I went from "Tom" to "Tom Sir" to "Brother" to "Uncle" to "Father" to "Father and Mother" (the highest honor one can bestow) in the course of just a few hours.

There are three children in particular, who are particularly competitive for my affections: Bipen, Anu Maya, and Anu. I literally can't get 5 feet without one, two or all three of them pulling at me persistently. In the picture, I had just sat down, when all three made a mad dash to make sure they were positioned as close to me as possible. Fiona, being quite amused at my being a piece of playground equipment, pulled out her camera, causing all three to instantly pose for a picture.

So, after countless dead lifts to give hugs, or "Superman"s above my head, my hamstrings and triceps are ready to snap. Combine that with sleeping on a bed where the mattress is the equivalent of a thick blanket and plywood for a box spring, and my body is in a full revolt. But strangely enough, I still find it impossible to say "No" when one of them rushes up to me with an ear-to-ear grin on their face.

This leads to the serious part of my entry, dear readers. I was complete unprepared for how much attention a child needs to thrive. Yes, they are well cared for...Clothed, bathed, fed, and Michael makes a point to tuck each child into bed personally each night. But it doesn't replace every child's need to be the center of an adult's world. I'm sure several of you got a good chuckle at my being referred to as "Mother" (ok, I might have chuckled at that one a little as well), but it shows how desperate these children are for the intense, personal love and attention that should have been their God given right. And I question how I, a person who's never spent more than about 30 minutes interacting with a child in my adult life, can fulfill this need for so many. It's only been 2 days, but I'm already physically exhausted. But mentally, I'm amp'd up, because failure is not an option. I owe it to these kids, and to all of you who have given so generously to the cause, to give it my all. I've got 26 more days, and I plan to make the most of it.

Namaste,

Tom

Clouds of Dust & Tickle Bunnies

2007-12-09T15:12:00.000-08:00

Today has been our first full day in Dhapasi and wow, what a different world it is here.

Tom and I are staying at the new home (Yellow Building) where Michael had reserved us the master suite. As an extra bonus this home has solar hot water. We were in bed by 9 pm & woke up at 3:30 am and decided to organise all the supplies we brought with us. By 5 am we heard the kids moving around downstairs. They were off for their morning jog. At 5:30 we heard heart wrenching sobs coming from the boys’ room. One of the little ones woke up in the dark crying since he couldn’t find his brothers. They had decided to let him sleep in since he was too little to take on the morning run. After a cuddle and continual reassurances that everyone was still here, he settled down and broke into his trademark toothy grin.

After their run, the kids fill the courtyard and go through their exercises; jumping jacks, stretches and the like. Tom joined in and made many new friends.

When we planned our trip, we thought it would be lovely to introduce all of you to the children, didis (big sisters) and other staff here.

I am going to start the introductions off with three gorgeous little girls I have nicknamed the Tickle Bunnies.

The children in the new home are very shy. Given their recent history with their last caregiver, it is not surprising. On our arrival, they were all very polite but wary. This morning while most of the children were in the yard for their exercises, I discovered Ashika, Jeny & Bhumika tucked into a single bed keeping each other warm. I stopped for a hug and discovered they really liked tickles and would start giggling before your hand could make contact with them.

From right: Jeny, Ashika, Bhumika.

Ashika is the most outgoing of the group. She is cute and she knows it. When she is caught doing something naughty or told to do something she is not happy with, she will just smile brilliantly and tell you with a shake of her head, “NO!”. She discovered the joy of dancing on Tom’s feet.

Jeny is quite the little spitfire. She was the one who initiated the tickles. She has limited English but is very happy chatting to me in Nepali. When I cannot respond, she put both little hands on my face and looks me deep in the eyes and starts chatting in Nepali again. As long as I smile, hug and tickle, she is quite happy with our interaction. She is also the only one that insists that Tom pretend to be a monster and chase her around the yard. She sure is a little personality!

Bhumika is has special needs. She is learning to walk but is much faster on her hands and knees. All the children dote on her and she responds with a beautiful smile. The center of her world at the moment is Mary Miss, the super efficient, wonderful volunteer here who has been running the home school.

Tea and sweet biscuits is served at 6:30 am. After tea, Tom and I headed off to the other home up the hill to start a session of hair braiding and getting ready for school. Shortly after we arrived, “Holi” was declared and school was cancelled. The disappointment in the children was just palatable.

Breakfast of dhal, rice and vegetables was served at 8 and at 9:30, 11 of the children walked down to the Yellow Building for a visit.

Just after 10 Anita and Sangita accompanied me to the bank to exchange currency and to a fabric shop to buy material for koltas for me. We walked down to the main street. By the time I reached there, I was quite certain I would not be allowed into any shops because I was covered in a deep layer of dust. Like Jamaica, there is constant construction in Nepal. With concrete and granite being the main building materials, there is just a layer of dust that covered everything.

When we arrived at the bank, I wasn’t sure we would make it in due to the large crowd gathered outside waving paperwork at the guards but Anita assured me that there were provisions for foreigners and we were ushered straight through the door.

The fabric store was yet another experience – Anita drives a hard bargain and Sangita was very determined to get me into colourful koltas. I succumbed to peer pressure.

Tom is constantly surrounded by children. He is the biggest, whitest, reddest person the children have ever seen. They think he is Spider-Man because they can see his scar from his surgery on his wrist. If allowed, they would spend hours just rubbing the inside of his forearm!

Much more soon,

And the Departure Date Nears...

2007-11-25T12:51:00.000-08:00

Good Afternoon Web Wanderers,

It seems hard to believe that the Thanksgiving Weekend is already coming to an end. In just 1 1/2 weeks, our plane will depart for the other side of the globe. My, how time has gotten away from us! So, as we make our last minute push to get everything together, this will be our last posting until we get settled into our new home.

To all of the many friends who have so generously given to our endeavor, Thank You! I really believe (through your contributions) that we've already made a difference and will continue to do so. For those of you yet to contribute, don't worry, there's still time. Your contributions are just as important and appreciated. I promise all to be rewarded with countless pictures of countless smiles.

Happy Holidays, my friends.

Best,

Tom

Spirit of Service

2007-10-14T06:48:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends (old and new),

I have spent the past month in Australia. While most of the time was spent with family, I also managed to catch up and meet with a lot of people interested in our trip and how they can help immediately and for the long term.

Tom & I are by no means doing anything heroic. Through the past few months, we have discovered that Michael and the children have been a very healing influence on our lives. What we hope to offer Papa's House is nothing compared to what has been given to us.

Before we even leave on our trip, I have learnt so much from people I have met:

1. People have wonderful hearts.

Just the mention of our trip and what we are planning to do gets the average person interested. They want to know what we are doing, how the children are and what they can do to help or if they can plan a similar trip. The usual question is "Are you going with a church or charity group?", the response that we found Papa's House on the internet and set up our visit with Michael leads to a few dropped jaws and "Wow, we would love to do something like that but wouldn't have know where to start". If nothing else, I hope our trip will let people realise that they too, can take time out of their usual life and rejuvenate their spirits by helping others. That each person can make a huge difference even if they do not have every resource in the world at their disposal.

2. People are disillusioned by charities.

For people who know us personally, they were more than willing to join in our journey by making a financial contribution to Papa's House. They know of Tom's meticulous nature when it comes to charitable financial accountability. But for people who don't know us, the natural question is "How do you know this is not dodgy?". It just breaks my heart that the general perception of charities is that of charity CEOs earning 6 figured salaries and wining and dining at the best restaurants while only a fraction of the donations make it through to those they are suppose to support. This dim view is often true. It has taken us many years, and many disappointments, to find a place to put our energies and our hard earned finances. I urge you not to give up looking for a cause to support. Keep the spirit of service alive in you.

A spirit of service that comes from the heart gives more that it thinks it can and in return, receives rewards beyond its imagination.

Let me close this note with a challenge. I challenge you to take time out from your everyday lives and plan to volunteer. Be it two weeks, or two months, find a project that captures your heart and your spirit. Step away from the excuses and as the Nike ads say "Just Do It".

http://www.VolunteerNepal.com/

Blessing to you,

Fiona

The Courage of One

2007-10-11T18:41:00.000-07:00

All it takes for evil to triumph in the world is for good men to do nothing. - Edmond Burke

Good evening Web Wanderers,

This week I've given much thought to Burke's quote above and what I call, "The Courage of One". Examples fill our collective ethos, perhaps the most notable being the photo of a lone man standing against 4 tanks in Tiananmen Square in 1989. But this is simply an example of the extreme...each day, people of courage and conviction perform acts big and small that, even if they are never noticed or recognized, leave an indelible mark on the social tapestry that binds us together. Each of us has the opportunity and potential to perform such acts every day of our lives. Yet, despite living blessed lives, the majority of us (myself included) go through entire days where the only person we enrich is ourself.

Then there are people with less than nothing who end up giving more than we can fathom. People, who despite their own adversity and unmet needs, give of themselves unconditionally and without reservation. This week I was introduced to one such extraordinary individual.

This past week, I learned that Michael assumed responsibility for a new orphanage with 12 young residents. The long story short, the individual who was in charge of the house was exposed as being a cheat, liar, and a drunk. The man stole all of the money that was intended to care for the children to support his own vices and philandering ways. The 12 children were expected to share a single twin bed, and were lucky to get a serving of rice each day; their diets void of vegetables or basic proteins. Their only care was provided by a lone didi (female house staff), Sabrita. Despite not receiving any of her owed wages, or a bed to lay her head each night, she has stayed in the home day after day to ensure the safety of the children and to provide for them to the very best of her capability.

This would be impressive and have earned my respect if the story ended there; but it does not. When you look at the picture of Sabrita to the left, you see the modest smile of a 27 year old woman. What you cannot see, and which silences me in awe, is that Sabrita has done all of this despite the fact that she lost her feet in a tragic accident as an infant. This amazing woman, who has every right to feel society should be taking care of her, instead has found the strength and innovation each day to care for 12 high energy youths. How many of us could claim to have such courage?

So now I'm a man on a mission. My trip to Nepal is no longer so much about the children, but rather meeting, being inspired by, and doing all I can to support remarkable individuals like Sabrita. I'll be in Nepal for only a month, and then I'll head home to the comfort of my own condo. My goal is to help give and/or develop the tools they need to be successful in their own lives so that they can continue to help others.

Fiona and I would love to be able to introduce Sabrita to a doctor who would be able to provide her prosthetic feet to increase her mobility and general quality of life. She deserves the same life-changing blessing that she bestowed on those 12 children. Without her, they never would have survived to join Michael's fold. If you, or someone you know, could be of assistance in this endeavor, please contact us at TomandFiona@JourneyToNepal.org. We're all immeasurably blessed when individuals stand up for what's right. People are inheriently good, but sometimes are afraid to stand up against seemingly unconquerable odds. But when one person stands up, it often gives the courage to another to stand beside them. And then two more. And then four. Join me at Sabrita's and Michael's side. Together we can indeed change these children's lives.

Humbly,

Tom

Thinking Beyond

2007-09-17T22:06:00.000-07:00

Good evening Web Wanderers,

A month has passed since our last entry, but that is not to say we've haven't been actively occupying our time preparing for the journey ahead. Our pile of supplies we're taking with us has grown substantially; almost to the point that I wonder how we'll be able to carry all of it and still have a change of outfits for ourselves. Much of our free time is spent either researching items the home is in need of, or socializing with others to help spread awareness of Papa's House and it's mission. We've met many new people along the way, and truly appreciate the moral support they have shown us and their generous financial support for orphanage itself. Thank you to all who have contributed or are considering to do so.

Over the past month, I decided where I want to focus when I'm in Nepal: I want to help the older children develop workable business plans and then help finance their venture once a viable plan is produced. At the end of the day, these children will grow up, and will need to be able to provide for themselves and their family in order to break the cycle of poverty and broken homes. Michael and I have exchanged several emails on the subject, and are also looking at ways to bring vocational training into the home. For example, we're currently looking to acquire an embroidery/sewing machine. Not only would it provide seamstress training for the girls, it could also help offset the costs of the home by allowing them to sew their own school uniforms and make basic repairs. Also, the embroidery function could allow a small business embroidering names or disney characters, on hats, sweatshirts, school bags, etc. So if anybody reading this blog has a contact with a sewing machine distributor that would be interested in helping in our cause, please email us at TomandFiona@JourneyToNepal.org .

For those visiting for the first time, please take a few moments to read our posts, and visit the Papa's House website at http://www.nepalorphanshome.net/ . For those with a few extra minutes on their hands, http://www.nepalorphanshome.net/news.asp is Michael's blog which gives extraordinary insight into the daily lives of the children.

Again, thank you for your support.

Best,

Tom

The Carabiners Arrived!

2007-08-14T20:14:00.000-07:00

Hello Web Wanderers,

Today Fiona and I got a pleasant surprise...the carabiners we ordered to help promote the website arrived. When we first created this blog, we began debating how to best "get the word" out about Papa's House and the Journey ahead of us. After going back and forth, we decided on custom made carabiner keychains. After numerous web searches, we found Marshall Song (lgyou@hotmail.com) at http://www.promoldings.com/. Pro Moldings is a Chinese based company, so it was a little nerve-racking wiring money overseas, but Marshall took our mission to heart and made us an excellent deal on producing these carabiners. He always treated Fiona and I with the utmost professionalism, so I highly recommend his company if you're looking for something similar.

You will notice that the keychains are "for sale", but really this is only to satisfy Google Checkout policies. Really, their purpose is strictly to help guide traffic to this site, so if you don't have one already, or you know people who would be interested in following Fiona's and my Journey, please let me know and I'd be happy to give you extra keychains to share. And since I would expect that "selling" them will open me to tax liabilities, my preference is for you to donate directly to Papa's House via the paypal link. But if you prefer for me to your steward to ensure the money is well spent, I have left the Google Checkout option available and I'll figure out the tax consequences when April 15th comes around. Ultimately, our goal in this all is to maximize your comfort and trust in supporting what we feel to be a vital institution.

This leads to the serious part of my entry this evening; why is Papa's House truly vital? It was recently reported that 1 out of 20 children in Nepal is an orphan. Some of these children have witnessed unimaginable acts of inhumanity. As Fiona highlighted in her previous blog, the Maoist problem is very serious. Some of these children have families, but it is simply too dangerous for the children to live with them due to the Maoists "recruiting" them through torturous means. Others have witnessed their mother being abducted, never to be seen again. And yet others have witnessed horrors too horrendous to think about. Michael Hess does everything in his power to provide a safe home and an education to these children to give them an alternative to being conscripted into Maoist "army" and a fresh start to acheive a potential that was almost deprived from them. Mikel Durham, an author and photojournalist, interviewed one of the boys in the home while visiting Nepal. An excerpt of his story follows:

"I have been in the orphanage for one and a half years. There was a Maoist problem in my village. The Maoists came to our house and asked for things, food. They came at night and if we could not provide food for them, they would beat us and do a lot of bad things. They showed us their guns and told us over and over, if we didn't give them what they wanted they would hit us and shoot us. They used to close the school and take us to their programs. One time they came and when I refused to go with them, they beat me. Then they took me to a far, far place. They did not give me food. And they threatened me. if I didn’t stay with them, the police and army would come and beat me. They locked me in a room. In the morning, they opened it again and brought me and some other children to a place far inside the jungle. One night, in the jungle, they told us that we could go home. But we were so far away that we didn’t know where our home was. So we could not leave. Then they took us further ahead and said, “You now have to join us.” They gave me a Maoist name. My mom and father were looking for me but they didn’t know where I was. One night we managed to escape from the Maoist camp in the jungle and I found my way back to my village. My family sent me away to here, to Papa's house so that I could be safe and get an education. I don't want to go back to my village."

Michael has spent over $200,000 of his own money (the vast majority of his assets) over the past few years to provide this safe sanctuary to 30+ and an education to over 340. But this isn't the main reason I've grown to respect him. I respect Michael most for allowing himself to become such a public figure in a land that knows no rule of law. Where any showing of "wealth" leads to people conniving and scheming how they can part him with it; whether it be by trickery or by physcial threats. However, despite the ever-present danger his work puts him in, Michael stays the course. Every time the threats reach new heights, the smiles and hugs of his "children" compell him to stay the course. Being willing to risk his own life (and that's not an exaggeration) in order to care, nurture and educate his charges is what truly earns Michael the right to carry the moniker "Papa".

Please take a few minutes to read Michael's website (http://www.nepalorphanshome.net/). Especially, read his "News" section (http://www.nepalorphanshome.net/news.asp). As you read his chronicles, you'll come to understand how much he truly cares about having each and every child grow and develop into a remarkable adult.

If you haven't done so already, please consider donating. Michael is not independantly wealthy and the continuation of his good works require our help. And of course, please share this website with your friends, family, and colleagues. Help create a sustaining wave that will ensure each child has the opportunity to reach their full potential.

Namaste,

Tom

Maoist Rebels 101

2007-08-05T22:23:00.001-07:00

Pictures: (l) from BBC News (r) from The Age Newspaper

"...Nepal has not normally loomed large in the consciousness of the average educated person in the English-speaking world." (John Whelpton, "A History of Nepal")

When we decided to spend a month in Nepal, it occurred to the both of us, that as well-read and traveled as we thought we might have been, we really didn't know much about Nepal, its history or even its current political situation, however, it is this political situation that Papa's House is so needed by the children and our support and understanding integral to its survival.

Most of the children at the Papa's House have been displaced due to Maoist rebels and I thought I would do some research and condense my reading into one blog entry for you.

Most of the reliable information I have been able to get my hands on have been written by John Whelpton. John's major work is "A History of Nepal" and he is currently an English teacher in Hong Kong. John has been wonderful in responding to my emails and answering my questions. However, this summary (based largely on web readings) and all its mistakes are mine alone.

The very basic of summaries is that since 1996, the Maoist rebels have waged a decade-long campaign against the constitutional monarchy. So far, the rebellion has left more than 12,000 people dead. The UN claims over 100,000 people have been displaced. Its envoy says the use of torture by government forces and rebels is routine. When King Gyanendra's direct rule ended in April 2006, the rebels entered talks on how to end the civil war. A landmark peace deal was agreed to in November and in early 2007 the Maoists joined an interim government

"Those who have money have to give them cash, those who have food have to give them rice, those who have clothes have to give them clothes, and those who have nothing have to give them one member of the family." (Ogura cited in John Whelpton, "Thoughts on the Maoist Problem").

While some members of the Maoist rebels have to chosen to join as their career path, many are "conscripted" to fight. Their ranks are made up of girls, boys, men and women of all ages. It is rumoured that the illustrious Gurkhas have provided their training, thus making them more formidable than the official Nepalese army.

This then brings us to Papa's House. The young Maoists cadres (Young Communist League) are proving to be particularly disruptive to everyday life; they are the ones travelling the country "converting" villages and villagers by persuation or brute force. It is assumed that many of the missing have been conscripted to fight or sold into prostitution in South and South East Asia. This is how many of the children at Papa's House have lost a parent or both. The young Maoists have come to their homes, taken all the food and money available, set fire to their humble homes and took away or killed their parent(s). The ones that make it to Papa's House are the most fortunate ones. They will forever bear the scars of witnessing their parents killed or kidnapped but for now, they have a safe home.

"Most ordinary citizens of Nepal are trying to survive by following the orders of whoever appears more powerful at a particular time and place." (John Whelpton, "Thoughts on the Maoist Problem).
The power of the Maoists grows through fear and intimidation. Last week we received an email from Michael saying that the previous night, the young Maoists marched through Dhapasi in the dead of night in formation and chanting. While Michael's school was being built, 100 YCL members moved in and then invited an extra 150 of their comrades to join them. There was nothing to do but wait until they got bored and moved along. Violence by the YCL has been legendary and although even former President Jimmy Carter has joined the call for the Maoists to rein in the YCL, there is little anyone can do but to sit out these school yard bullies.

I am a total outsider who hasn't quite faced the real reality of what is happening on a daily basis. I find myself asking "why are they letting the Maoists trample all over their lives?" but deep down, I also know why. Daily survival for food and shelter wears on you very quickly. How can you even think about standing up to people with guns when you can't even feed yourself and your family? Is it so bad for the poorest amongst them to give the Maoists a child to fight, knowing that the child may die anyway because they cannot feed them?

Democratic elections are scheduled for the 22nd of November 2007 with the Maoist Party registering itself this July to contest the elections. There is great hope for Nepal to finally find its feet but the reality is that the Maoists are already planning the next "People's Movement" despite participating in the democratic process.

Naturally, the Maoist situation and the general Nepalese political stage is many times more complicated than I have laid out, but I do hope it gives you an quick idea of what is going on and how these children have come to need the sanctuary of Papa's House & Papa's Trinity Academy and why they need our support.

Fiona

Let the Blog Begin

2007-07-29T17:36:00.000-07:00

Hello Friends, Family, and Web Wanderers.

For those who don't know me, my name is Tom Gilbert, and my wife Fiona and I are planning a trip to Dhapasi, Nepal (on the outskirts of Kathmandu) to volunteer for 1 month at Papa's House (http://www.nepalorphanshome.net/). The orphanage is run by Michael "Papa" Hess, an American who moved to Nepal three years ago after being introduced to these remarkable children. Beyond meeting the physical and emotional needs of 30+ children in his direct charge, Michael founded Papa's Trinity Academy, a school providing an education to 340 children of the greater community without regard to their ability to pay.

Fiona and I stumbled upon Papa's House after deciding we needed to remove ourselves from the "comfort zone" of our daily rountine that is in fact slowly wearing thin our physical, emotional, and spiritual well being. We believe this will be a life-defining voyage...a journey more of the mind than of the body. The main thing that drew us to Papa's House is the smile on each and every one of the children's faces. Too often, orphans are used as part of a marketing campaign; often times the children are unbathed and miserable, with the tag line that unless you help immediately, the child will surely die. While these images invoke a strong, emotional response, I often wonder, "Why can't they even meet the basic need of bathing this child, or give him or her the love and nurturing such that a smile is inevitable despite legitimately having the right to wallow in despair?" Our goal is to support a man, who through his own personal finances, has succeeded in developing a framework for instilling hope in the hopeless.

When you browse the website, you may not feel the need is urgent. All the children are indeed well fed, clothed, clean, and receiving an excellent education. But I submit to you, this is exactly when your support is needed and will have maximum returns. Your money will not be used to fix old mistakes or pay off bad debt. Michael isn't exploiting the children for his own personal gain as happens far too often in other orphanages.

Fiona and I have already booked our tickets and started gathering arts, crafts, toothbrushes, and other supplies to bring the children. Despite that we don't board a plane for over 4 months, we're constantly thinking, "I wonder if the children would like that." Fiona and I exchange emails almost daily with Michael. Each exchange is roughly the same; after a brief update to the previous email, we try to figure out what we can bring with us that would further support in the care, education, and nurturing of the children, and each time Michael responds to just bring ourselves. He never asks for anything, and yet, because we know there are so many areas where we can help, our minds are constantly in motion.

Please give thoughtful consideration as to whether you would like to contribute to this journey. Donations can be made directly to Papa's House at http://www.nepalorphanshome.net/donate.asp or via the paypal button in the column to the left. I'm also "selling" JourneyToNepal.org carabiner keychains via Google Checkout. They were intended to be a free gifts, but Google does not allow me to collect donations as I am not personally a tax-exempt charity. So while I recommend donating directly to Papa's House, I would be happy to collect your donations through the Google link in the "Buy a Carabiner" section in the left hand column. I will distribute all Google Checkout payments once I am on the ground in Nepal and verify first hand that everything is how it appears. You can also discover other volunteer opportunities at Michael's other website http://www.volunteernepal.com/.

Please feel free to contact us with any questions.

Until later,

Tom